June 29, 2003

OMG'sh! Can you believe Demi's

OMG'sh! Can you believe
Demi's bod? I read an article on MSN that talked about her eating "in-the-raw."
Eating naked? No, really, she looks so fantastic, but I just can't imagine
eating like that all the time. A cheeseburger that's not made with meat or
cheese? A steak that's made of walnuts, almonds, sunflowers seeds? Cheesecake
not made with cheeses or cream? What? I don't know if I could do it. Right now I
weigh in at 145. I am 5'8 and am supposedly in my right BMI and weight for
height, etc. etc. etc., but I personally feel better when I am about 128 pounds
a size 5/6 (not 8). I don't think I struggle with weight. I like myself thinner,
not skinny! I also feel healthier when I am thinner and more fit. Moving here
has been a struggle and so I quit walking and I stopped really paying attention
to eating as well as I did. I have a fast metabolism, but am over 30 now and
that seems to be affecting everything. We went to Church at Calvary Chapel in
St. George this morning. We saw our good friends, Victor and Griselda. They
invited us over for lunch! Mmmmmmmmmmmm....Carne Asada. It was beef that had
been marinated in Garlic Salt and Lemon and then grilled. I helped her chop and
slice and dice and she taught me how to make her fabulous salsa! It was all so
tasty! I ate so much good food. It was also so very nice to visit with fellow
Christians. We have been attending CC in Cedar City. They preach the Word of
God, but we just don't seem to fit in there. There are no children except ours
and a few others, but none the ages of our children. I really think that they
minister better to couples with no children,those whose children are grown, and
retired people. So, R and I are going to look around to find something that
better suits the place we are in life right now. It is very hard to move away
from a support system like we had back in Missouri. We left so much there. I
know, I know this is a new beginning, bloom where you're planted, blah, blah,
blah. None of those pleasantries take away from the sadness of the heart at the
loss of such kindred spirits. My heart is sometimes so sad. I wonder if we have
made the right decision in moving here. One of my friends asked me if R making
more money was worth everything we gave up. It really ticked me off because we
didn't come here just because of his increase in income. We talked a lot about
this. We knew that it would be very challenging to live in a state dominated by
the LDS religion. But we prayed and know that God lead us here. So, that is my
only comfort at times. I feel so lonely because this church doesn't really
fellowship with each other. It has such opportunities being so small (only about
30). I feel sometimes that we (R and I) are having to "prove" ourselves to the
pastor and his family. I love to help with worship and requested to be able to
help with it back in December. I was told to wait 6 months and see where things
were at that time and then I could help. Well, 6 months has come and gone and
nothing. The one time I did help (Good Friday Service), the pastor was really
uncomfortable with it. I was asked by the worship leader to help. I just don't
understand it. We have lived here for 8 months and haven't been in anyones home
for a meal. We have had several couples over because we love hospitality and
fellowshipping. It makes it so lonely. Blogging is good for me because I have
lost the eloquence of the written word that I once had, so this is truly an
exercise of my mind.

Posted by Rae at June 29, 2003 06:23 PM
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