January 31, 2005
And now for something completely different
I confess to having never made home made whipped cream, until tonight.
I was craving a chocolate cake with cream, just like Flaca makes. So, I bought the whipping cream, added the vanilla and sugar, and voile!
Sweet chocolate perfection.
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Rae, I need your help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! please a recipe of cookies, yes? yours are the best!!!!!!!!! and thanks!!
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virginia on February 1, 2005 06:57 AM
Flaca- are you talking about the chocolate chip cookies?
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Rae on February 1, 2005 11:29 AM
I can't eat anything but homemade. I make mine with honey sometimes, adds a different sweetness.
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Ith on February 1, 2005 11:41 AM
Ith- you mean the whipped cream with honey? Hmmm, that sounds interesting. I used regular as was advised not to use ultra-pastuerized because it makes a much more runny whipped cream. Sure enough, this morning, we had a perfect cream available for the girls chocolate cake and my coffee (hey- chocolate cake is breakfast- remember Cosby? "Dad is great! Give us the chocolate cake!")
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Rae on February 1, 2005 11:48 AM
Yeah, instead of sugar, use a little honey. And over the holidays I made gingerbread with molasses sweetened cream. It was yummy!
If you beat cream to almost butter, it makes a great scone topping with strawberry jam.
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Ith on February 1, 2005 01:01 PM
Actually any kind, your X-mas buckets are so good, I can use any of those!!!
And Honey, mmm taht is really interesting, we must try it!
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virginia on February 1, 2005 01:16 PM
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January 30, 2005
Mmmmm
As already reported, I have purchased one case of Thin Mints to be immediately placed in our freezer.
Greg (his daughter, Allie, is involved in Girl Scouts) will gladly take all the cookies you purchase for the staff and members to a local cancer center. Follow the instructions given in the post.
So, if you want some vicarious sugary, chocolaty, tasty, Girl Scout-y, goodness without all the extra calories and fat, head over and purchase a box to donate.
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Hi "LikelyStory",
I don't call myself "reformed" but when Jesus Christ said “it is finished", I believe He meant it. In fact, anyone who says that the elect sinner has to meet a condition in order to be saved should take note of these biblical propositions:
1.The righteousness of God that is revealed in the gospel is His salvation of sinners based on the propitiatory sacrifice and imputed righteousness of Jesus Christ alone (Rms 3:21-4:8; 10:4; 2 Cor 5:21).
2.Those who are ignorant of the righteousness of God revealed in the gospel are going about to establish a righteousness of their own and are thus lost, no matter how zealous they are for God (Romans 10:1-3).
3.Anyone who does not abide in the doctrine of Christ is lost (2 Jn 9).
4.Anyone who speaks peace to one who brings a false gospel is lost (2 Jn 11)
"LikelyStory", I'd be interested to know what you think of our website.
OUTSIDE THE CAMP
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Andrew C. Bain on January 30, 2005 09:43 PM
It's nice to know where your "cookies" are coming from?! I got my personal call for an order about three weeks ago. Too much of a good thing ;)
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chrys on January 31, 2005 05:01 AM
Hey Rae, who's your friend up there?
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Patrick on January 31, 2005 09:13 AM
I have absolutely no idea. I can't decide if I should delete that "stuff" or not....
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Rae on January 31, 2005 09:20 AM
Hey Rae: Thanks for this link. Just to make sure I don't have any disappointed cookie-lovers, let me hasten to add that all cookies are actually for the patients and staff at the cancer center. So, anyone who donates through the button on my website will actually be buying the cookies for someone else who will truly appreciate it. When we deliver the cookies to the cancer, they will be accompanied by a card containing the names of all who donated. Thanks!
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Greg on January 31, 2005 10:20 AM
Oh, hey, thanks for clarifying, Greg.
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Rae on January 31, 2005 03:12 PM
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Suffrage
Somehow, I think that if this were about something else,
American liberal femininists couldn't be kept quiet in their celebration.
H/T: Patrick
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It is so sad that we cannot see the possible joy in what is happening in Iraq. That country faces a long road, fraught with danger, but they are voting. Are there problems and risks? Of course, but wouldn't it be nice of the carping, and backbiting, and political polarization were balanced by the even the smallest recognition that there is good news over there as well? I have no problem with the MSM being critical of public policies in general, so long as the criticism is fair, but wouldn't it be great if, as a country, we projected a support of democratic principles in general?
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Greg on January 31, 2005 08:27 AM
Well, in fairness, I have to admit something after my last comment. I just walked outside to get my paper, the San Francisco Chronicle--that bastion of bias masquerading as legitimate liberalism--and I have to give them credit where it is due. They have a full width bold headline that reads: "BIG TURNOUT BUOYS HOPES." Now, that ain't all bad.
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Greg on January 31, 2005 08:32 AM
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January 29, 2005
To Kill or Not to Kill
My comments on a very interesting post over at Zombyboy's(with a few editorial alterations):
"I am opposed to the death penalty and that sometimes shocks some of my Protestant friends. A phrase I like to repeat when they begin to quote Old Testament (and thus old law- you can't pick and choose which of the several hundred laws to follow and impose and which to dismiss to "culture") to me is "If everyone returned an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, we would all be blind and toothless." That's not to say I don't believe in[sic] defending myself, my family, or my country. I will take up arms, and might have to die by them, in order to protect, but this Christian believes that only God can, in perfect judgment and being perfect righteous, take life.
Now, from a practical standpoint, the death penalty is far more costly than life imprisonment. It does absolutely nothing to reform the criminal. It is simply a punishment, and as I a parent I recognize the need to punish, but to a greater extent to help the child rid themselves of an offending habit or behavior through daily discipline and education. Sometimes I let them reap the natural consequences; other times I intervene. I think that counseling should be required of every public offender, and medications administered if necessary. I realize that the government can't force the inmates to take medication or to be receptive to cognitive therapy, but it can offer it and keep it's own conscience clean by it's honest attempts at reforming and changing criminal mindset and behavior.
Don't ask me "what if someone violently murdered your child/spouse?" I haven't experienced that and God-willing, hope I never will. I do believe that principles determine our actions, and by adhering to them now, I will be as conservative with my own wrath and desire for revenge as I expect others to be. I have read studies that show that the families of those who have been murdered or been the victim of a violent crime, show no more long-term resolution when the criminal has been executed than those whose offender has not been. I hope that I can trust God Himself to administer justice when human government cannot or does not."
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i share the same sentement towards the death penalty. your response to those opposing your stance is quite logical and i love using logic to combat opposition. i will have to remember that one: "blind and toothless."
over the past two years God has given me the greatest blessing i could ask for. i can now trust completely in him; sometimes i just get this overwelming feeling of being held in his hands (me in the fetal postition) like a precious jewel or Moses in his floating basket.
i have other things to say about this topic, but i just can't seem to put them into words. If someone close to me was taken away i can now truly believe God would bless me and remind me of this understanding all over again. i have done my time doubting God and his motives; it is now about whether i can listen to his direction; i now question my decisions and my motives in relation to his direction. my life has never been the same, the amount of joy and love in my life and relationships has never been as high. thank you Jesus.
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nick on January 30, 2005 01:45 AM
Hello Rae,
I am not suprised by Z's view on this topic, or yours. You both have a good size heart and both of you are giving of charity and Christian mercy. Something that is lost on many Christians.
I am not near as firm as either of you in my views on this topic. I do believe that the young and 25 maybe even 30 or under crowd could be rehabilitated. I do not think that middle aged men who committ heinous acts should be shown much mercy. Murder is something that I believe should hold a greater penalty, not for teaching anyone anything, but as an ultimate punishment. In other words, you commit the ultimate crime, you will get the ultimate punishment.
One of my salesmen who drives in from San Antonio twice a week stopped by today for the first time in about 2 weeks. He has been on jury duty. During the trial, the jury, of which my salesman was the foreman, found the defendant guilty of aggrevated assault and armed robbery. During the sentencing phase of the trial the defendants record came out showing that he had been convicted of a string of other crimes including rape, robbery, assault, and domestic abuse. This is a path that this man has chosen to stay on. What was this guy doing back on the street after a rape? I don't have much mercy for people like this, and if he would've added murder to his list, I wouldn't shed a tear for his snuffing. I would instead, pray that he found God before his soul started it's journey.
I do believe that there is a new law that we live by and that we don't live under the old law. However, I also believe in submitting to the government, as spoken about in Timothy, and this is a matter that, fortunately, I don't even have to think about, until I am in the same place my salesman was for the past two weeks, or perhaps if a vote is pushed.
Anyway, one of the jury members wanted to give the guy 15 years in jail, and my salesman pushed for life. The jury comprimised on a 60 year sentence, which will be life for this guy, as he is 43, and hopefully he won't be parolled before his days are up.
That's my take.
Superhero
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Superhero on February 2, 2005 01:10 PM
Remember, Supe, I never said that I was against life imprisonment. Someone who demonstrates incorrigibility shouldn't receive the same benefits as his fellow citizens who restrain themselves from breaking the laws and the hearts of the people. I do realize that I would be tempted to retaliate in a way that would maim someone for life (not every joint can be replaced).
But thank you for thinking that I have Christian charity :D
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Rae on February 5, 2005 01:34 PM
I correspond regularly with an inmate who comitted murder as a juvenile, and got 20 years due to his minor status. He became a Christian in prison. If the government followed the policies I think are right, this man would have been executed within a year and hence most likely would have died in his sins. Even though I am sobered by this, it is not enough to cause me to change my mind on the death penalty issue. Although I am certainly glad that God has seen fit to extend His mercy even to prisoners.
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kgowen on February 13, 2005 04:06 PM
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Bankrupt Baby
Million Dollar Baby wasn't worth the $6.50 ticket price.
What began as an engaging story of triumph and overcoming one's socio-economic status, spiraled quickly down to euthanasia. As usual, the priest was shown to be dispassionate, and Frankie's convictions and principles disposable to the tears of a depressed woman. The character of Maggie was one of a fighter, so to see the plot allow her strength disintegrate, and Frankie's lack of will to "train" her mind as he did her body to respond to the punches of life, was deeply disappointing.
As soon as I saw the result of her title fight, I leaned over and whispered to R what the conclusion would be. When my thoughts were confirmed, I knew instantly why Hollywood embraced this film. It fully supports a liberal agenda and dismissive/permissive attitude toward the definition of the value of life.
All that said, Hilary Swank did an outstanding job. She is a gifted actress with a wonderful ability to be absorbed into her character. So, I guess it appropriate that she be nominated for an Oscar. She said in an interview with Time that people frequently ask her when she is going to play a pretty girl role. I confess that I have had that thought, as well.
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You know, I don't think I've ever seen that movie described as anything but a "boxing movie."
Interesting.
by
Craig on February 6, 2005 07:00 AM
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January 28, 2005
Tender Heart
Yesterday the gray sky dominated the morning and afternoon. An early morning rain had already quenched this desert's thirst and a light sprinkling continued throughout the day. After school, I loaded the two younger girls into the van to do a few errands.
On our way home, I took Main. I sometimes prefer the color and comfort of the buildings and people rather than the destination speeders of the highway. As we drove along, Performance Today going in the background, C pointed out something in the middle of the road. She thought it to be trash. I recognized the crumpled form of a yellow tabby. Before I even considered the consequences, I uttered a low and sad ooohhhhhhh.
Read more Tender Heart »
C questioned my response. I told her that it wasn't refuse, but a small cat. Her brow wrinkled. I continued driving. About five minutes passed when a quiet sob slipped out of her. I looked over and then touched her arm. She broke down, weeping. I asked her what was so upsetting. She said she felt so sorry for the cat. I held her hand and continued driving while she cried. I asked her what about the cat's death made affected her so strongly. She told me that she didn't understand why people just dumped animals. It was wrong. I explained that perhaps the cat did have a home and was out. She said it was "just so sad" and that she would like to have given it a home and loved it, taken care of it. So, with that information, I rephrased her statement into a question: "Being with people who love you is important to you, isn't it?" Her tear-stained face nodded. "So, the thought of the cat being alone is upsetting to you?" "Yes," she choke out. I reaffirmed how much we loved her and how much I appreciated her compassionate nature and her desire to help all God's creatures who are in need.
She continued to cry quietly. After I pulled into the drive way, I leaned over and hugged her and told her that I loved her so very much. C held onto me for awhile. I heard her breathing begin to slow, and when a final cleansing sigh expelled the grief she had felt, she let go and said, "Thanks, mom. I love you, too."
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Hmmm... wonder where -or from whom- C acquired her tender heart? ;)
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pam on January 28, 2005 12:08 PM
Boy, do I empathize with her.
(cried more than a few times myself over dead pets on the freeway)
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Ith on January 28, 2005 12:09 PM
I was just like C too. I wanted to be a veterinarian, but then I found out that they sometimes have to kill animals at the owners request, and I just didn't think I could do that. Every time I have to drive over road kill I cringe, and sometimes get sick to my stomach--death is always sad--it is a result of the fall, not how God intended things to be....just thinking out loud here. I like the way you handled that with her, it was very tender.
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Joyella on January 28, 2005 09:16 PM
Interesting, Joyella. Our second oldest wants to be a vet, but we have already begun to try to strengthen her for the ethunasia of animals (explaining it is better to put an animal out of its misery than to let it suffer). She a very strong J and I think it bothers her a bit, but she can justify the need. C is a P and an extreme F, so her little heart is typically full of empathy for every creature.
Ith- me, too. I find it so hard to see a dog wandering down the street and obviously looking around for a certain something or someone.
Pam- Awww, thanks. That was a great compliment and so kind of you.
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Rae on January 29, 2005 12:47 PM
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January 27, 2005
A Summer Wedding
My terrific baby brother, whom I love and am proud to be associated with, is getting married to a wonderful, pretty, smart, kind woman.
I am so happy for you. The ring is just gorgeous, too :D [It might look small in the picture, but it most definitely isn't small].
P.S. "Ann," you know who to call when you need to understand your mother-in-law, right?
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Scandalous choice of ring - wondrous. Now what would you know about Ann's Mother-in-Law ;-D
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chrys on January 27, 2005 02:04 AM
thank you sis! we are in the process of reserving a chapel. it will be in eureka springs, ark on june 25th, mother in law's b-day, in Thorncrown Chapel. you can check it out on-line at www.thorncrown.com. we have it from 7:00 to 8:30 and sunset is at 8:30 so it will be really nice. love you
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nick on January 27, 2005 11:59 AM
thanks too sister!! im so excited, the place is awesome (especially at sundown!). yes, i will defintely call you when in desperate need! mother-in-law will love this as her 'birthday present! i cant wait to see all the girls!
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Ann on January 27, 2005 10:17 PM
Nick and "Ann"- R was really happy with the date as he as an opportunity to do some white water rafting with the company in June. He missed out on a few adventures last year because of visitors or traveling, so he was reallllllly hoping your wedding date choice wouldn't fall on one of those weekends.
I think that mom and I went there once when we had traveled with the church to see the Passion Play. It looks and seems very familiar.
How did you come to choose it?
P.S. Sorry about not posting the ring on your hand, "Ann." It would shwo me the html code for the picture for some reason, but would for the one of the ring only.
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Rae on January 28, 2005 11:22 AM
Rae-we're glad that R can go sporting with his work! the date seemed to work out great for everyone! we chose the place, well we decided to give them a call and see if they even had any openings. this place fills up fast. we got the last spot open in june, unless we wanted the wedding at 8 o'clock in the morning!! i think not! yes, mom-in-law said that she has been there also. we both wanted to get hitched in a 'cool' place that wasnot a boring church, this worked out perfect! its okay bout the other ring picture! it made my fingers look fat anyway!! cant wait to see you guys!!
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Ann on February 1, 2005 01:19 PM
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January 26, 2005
On my bedside stand (or beside it on the floor)
The Random House Biographical Dictionary
Webster's New World Dictionary
Le Mot Juste- A Dictionary of Classical and Foreign Phrases
The New Well-Tempered Sentence- A Punctuation Handbook for the Innocent, the Eager, and the Doomed.
Williams-Sonoma Catlog
February Lucky
February In Style
FebruaryThe Atlantic
Charlotte's Web (Reading to K, but have paused and need to return to Charlotte, Wibur, Templeton [or "Pimpleton" as K sometimes calls him] and the race to save the pig).
A Little Princess (Reading to C, but we paused during Christmas to read other books; so we need to return to Sara Crewe).
The Content of Our Character
Looking for God in Harry Potter
1 travel reading lamp
1 mechanical pencil
1 ink pen
1 highlighter
An old hymnal
My NAS Bible
A Pile of Gantt Charts (thanks to me husband)
"Et Al"- my 3 inch Three-Ring Binder of everything home-education
2 Euro Pillows
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Wow, Gantt Charts are some great night reading...
*looks to see what action items I have for tomorrow*
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Jeremy on January 27, 2005 06:40 AM
-Williams Sonoma's little buddy - Pottery Barn catalog - CHECK
-February (and January, and December...) In Style - CHECK
-February Lucky - CHECK
-Mechanical Pencil - CHECK
-A Little Princess - One of my FAVORITES!
-And I don't know what Gantt charts are...but I have my NFP charts! :-)
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Nicole Prescott on January 27, 2005 10:44 AM
Nicole- how funny and ironic! Patrick once joked about me somehow being a long lost sibling or somehow otherwise related to your family.
It took me a few minutes (actually while I was driving it came to me) to figure out NFP charts. I laughed out loud when I figured it out. You made me laugh aloud, too. :D
A Gantt chart is a horizontal flow chart (so, technically, it could work as an NFP chart, too ;) ) of scheduling your time and activities. I requested R bring one home to me so that I could attempt to use it to schedule my day and sometimes I do my "homework" while sitting in bed at night.
Jeremy- just making the most of my time ;)
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Rae on January 28, 2005 10:51 AM
Nicole- check out the outfits on page 127 and 132. I think they are so cute. And have you noticed lean toward gold jewelry?
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Rae on January 28, 2005 06:09 PM
Oh, you two are going to get along famously.
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Patrick on January 28, 2005 08:11 PM
Nicole, tell Rae what your dream job is (Besides neonatal nursing. Nicole got accepted to nursing school today!)
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Patrick on January 28, 2005 08:12 PM
Congratulations, Nicole! :D
Neonatal nursing, hmmmm? I have thought seriously about being a "doula"- someone who coaches a woman through her labor is she desires to have a natural birth (however, am not an Anti-Meds Nazi, different situations necessitate different actions).
Perhaps you were somehow right, Patrick (and thanks for finally commenting on my blog ;p)
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Rae on January 29, 2005 09:55 AM
Pat and Rae- Thanks for the congrats! I am so excited (and relieved) that I was accepted! I have also thought about Labor and Delivery and Pediatric ICU. Definitely not Geriatrics...I can just go home for that (Aww, that was mean sorry).
Well, my OTHER dream job is to be a personal shopper, and that the rich lady I shop for would give me a certain amount of money to spend on myself everytime I shop for her! Sounds good, doesn't it? :-)
I will have to look at the pages you mentioned. I HAVE noticed the gold jewelry and am not too excited about it...my promise ring and engagement ring are white gold...it's just not going to work out. I don't like mixing yellow and white gold, ya know? What is a girl to do in this kind of situation?! ;-)
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Nicole Prescott on February 1, 2005 11:56 AM
Oh my goodness, Nicole~ I can't believe it. We are cut from the exact same 100% cotton cloth!
I think that white gold and yellow gold can look really nice together- it just depends on the design. I have an 8mm wide barrel band and this year am getting a diamond [one carat, Emerald cut] (15 years) and I think I will go with platinum and then slip a small plantinum band underneath my original band to tie it all together.
Nicole- have you read the Shopaholic series?
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Rae on February 1, 2005 12:25 PM
That sounds like it will be really pretty. YOWZERS! A whole carat! :-)
I have not read the Shopaholic series...what is it? I really need to read more (at least something that isn't about triglycerols, ketones, or lipids). ;-)
by
Nicole Prescott on February 1, 2005 03:30 PM
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January 24, 2005
Life Means So Much
As has been noticed by any reader of regularity, the relationship between my mother and I while growing up was strained to say the least.
Once in the midst of one of our fights, I asked why she didn't just abort me. She paused. "I could've. All my friends were doing it. But, it was 1970 and it was illegal and I didn't want to break the law."
For the sake of the law, I am here today, living and breathing. For the sake of the law, four beautiful souls have breathed the sweet mountain air, bodysurfed in the amniotic warmth of the Pacific, ridden a bike, watched fireworks while cuddled-up and slapping mosquitoes, comforted one another's tears, eaten a roasted marshmallow, giggled together at night, and known that they were truly loved.
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Thank God in Heaven for a law that once protected me when I could not protect myself.
The highest percentage of women seeking and getting abortions aren't poor women. They are middle to upper-middle class, white women ages 18-24. It is the "conundrum" of choosing between an education and a child; between telling parents that that the extra-curricular activities of college have required a bit more responsibility than anticipated and telling parents.....nothing. Sometimes parents, in their own anticipated shame, encourage an abortion. It just doesn't look like we did a good job parenting if they come home knocked-up or having knocked-up.
This girl has been there and done that. I was pregnant with E my junior year in college. I ignored my two missed periods all the while knowing. When I finally went in to the drug store to buy a test, I turned my opal ring around to look like a wedding band. I was embarrassed to be purchasing something that was for a married woman and I obviously wasn't.
I took the test- twice. Both times it was positive with not "a faint color," but the very distinct color indicating hCG present in my body. I was instantly afraid. I was instantly embarrassed. I was instantly panicked. I could hardly sleep. R was on the east coast getting ready to get on a plane to the Middle East.
After a very fretful night, I got up and went to work. On my break, I called the student clinic and made an appointment. After a quick exam, the over-the-counter test was confirmed. The female doctor left the room for a few minutes to allow me to dress. She returned with a very serious look on her face, as well she should. This was a serious predicament.
She began by asking me what I had thought about. Nothing. I had thought of nothing for the past 12 hours. Well, I mean I had a million thoughts flying through my head, but none of them slow enough for me to recognize. When I took a minute to allow the first two things to pull over long enough for me to assign them some meaning, I realized I was paralyzed with shame in telling my parents, and paralyzed with fear in telling R. Let me insert here, that the parents of whom I was fearful of disappointing were the ones who had taken me into their home at 15 and made me a part of their family; they had invested and sacrificed for me and in me; the thought of somehow making them feel it was all a waste of time made my heart wrench. I knew not to tell my own mother a darn thing until I had found the solution. I knew she would immediately project her own circumstances from so long ago onto me and pressure me to have an abortion; after all, it was perfectly legal now.
Dr. X could see the pain in my heart and hear the concern in my voice. She reminded me that I didn't know if R would accept any responsibility; that he was on his way to war and what if I married him in haste and then he died and I was left alone to raise a child by myself? She advised me of a place, a "warm and understanding" place, where I would receive help and counseling. And an abortion at a discounted rate. She gave me the recommend to take along. I remember somehow nodding to all of it, not really being conciliatory, but just moving my fuzzy and numb and pounding head.
My body was exhausted when I returned home late that night after working a 10 hour day. I promised myself a short nap and then much contemplation and problem-solving when I awakened. I slept for 14 hours straight in my catering uniform. Luckily, I had the next few days off. I drove home and told my parents. It was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do, but the shame only lasted the three minutes it took for me to get it out, and for them to walk over and hug me.
After arriving home, I called long-distance information seeking the number for the camp in which R was stationed. I reached a nasal-toned operator who put me through to his unit. I asked for him but was told that he was "in the field" and I was assured he would receive the message to return my phone call. Meanwhile, in the field, R confesses to his best friend and fellow Marine, that he thinks I might be pregnant, and asks his advice. "M" told him that if I was, then he, R, had a responsibility to care for a life that he had helped create.
When finally got to talk, we talked for days. This wasn't some one-night-stand (in which case I would strongly urge a woman to consider adoption). We had known one another for a little over two years. This was a child from the very beginning. There was never a question of what was growing in me, only of how to provide the best for this person whose very life depended on what decision we made. My heart lept when he asked me how fast I could get to him. I began to weep and told him within the next two days, I was sure. After I put the receiver down, my body shook from relief and excitement. The rest is in the pages of this blog- that is, our life together with not only E (born seven months later, a very healthy eight pounds and four ounces) who, 13 years later, is a very healthy 100 pounds dripping wet, but with all of the children formed in the heart of God and forged through the love of R and me. She is as beautiful as the day she was born. At least once a day, I look into her eyes and see the same baby who peeked at me through the bright light of a delivery room all those years ago. The expression is still there: What a wonderful world! She is caring, intelligent, considerate, and has so very much to contribute to this life. She has challenged me to greater heights than I ever anticipated myself able to surmount.
A few years ago, after some consistent questions of the nature of her conception, I put the other children to bed and invited her to stay up a little later with me. I told her how she was a surprise. I told her how scared I was. I told her how I never thought her less than a human being with a soul and completely dependent on me for life. I told her how we both loved her so very much and wouldn't change anything about how she came to be; how we longed for and anticipated seeing her face, holding her in our arms. I so wanted her to realize that she was wanted, desired, and loved. Planned, no. But as life so often reveals, the best things never are planned by us anyway.
So, for the sake of the law, I am alive. And so is my lovely E.
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Wow. I couldn't ask for a more eloquent comment on the impact of Roe-vs.-Wade.
by
Cindy Swanson on January 25, 2005 04:27 AM
from a lifelong pro-choicer-
that was a very sweet, thoughtful, and touching post.
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Jo on January 25, 2005 03:43 PM
...a very open , heartfelt expression. Thanks for sharing, I'm glad you and E are here :)
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anita on January 25, 2005 07:32 PM
Thank you for sharing that slice of your personal history with us. I am so glad to hear that not only did you and R fully and graciously accept E into your lives, but so did your parents.
One of my closest friends became pregnant at age 16, by her 17th birthday she was in the thick of diapers and burp cloths. It radically changed her life, and her son is now almost 16 years old. He is such a wonderful boy, indeed a blessing. The most remarkable aspect of her story was that her parents, being very strict fundamentalist christian people, stretched their arms around her and gave her the most supporting environment to raise that child. God's grace always exceeds our expectations. It is fabulous.
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Joyella on January 25, 2005 09:03 PM
Rae, that is beautiful, thanks so much for sharing, that story really touched me. I was very nearly aborted in 1970, so this really hits home.
God bless you and R and your children!
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Feeble Knees on January 26, 2005 08:00 AM
That was one of the most beautiful things I've ever read; thank you for sharing something so close to your heart.
Part of me never wanted to find my birth mother because of the words given you by your mother: "I didn't want to break the law".
May God Bless you and your wonderful family.
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pam on January 26, 2005 01:56 PM
Thank you all for your encouraging words.
Pam, I think whether she would say it or not, she still had a choice. Many women still chose abortion though it was illegal. Although my mother's words stung me, I have had to focus on the fact that she ultimately did not abort me, and that has to say something.
by
Rae on January 28, 2005 10:57 AM
Your writing and your self-expression is so beautiful, Rae. But it could never be so without a heart to match. I admire so much how you take the time to see--to really see--the beautiful things in life. Thank you for your example. Would that I had more time; I'd probably be addicted to your blog.
by
H. on January 28, 2005 06:44 PM
Rae,
DON'T DO THAT. You need to put some kind of a warning in the prelude saying something like, "Super, don't read this until you get home." So I'm not sitting here with tears rolling down my face when I'm supposed to be this big macho boss guy.
What an awesome testimony for life!
I have two similar stories for you one with a similar ending and one with the opposite. You must let me tell you sometime.
-Super
by
Superhero on February 2, 2005 01:25 PM
Hey, Supe! Glad to see you around again.
Awww, thanks, I think?
by
Rae on February 4, 2005 11:35 PM
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Rae at
08:48 PM
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Comments (10)
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A Fine Memory
»
TexasBug links with:
Life Means So Much - A Personal Side of Roe V Wad
»
ProLifeBlogs links with:
Life Means so Much - A Personal Side of Roe v Wade
»
Absinthe & Cookies (a bit bitter, a bit sweet) links with:
From The Heart
»
Notes in the Key of Life links with:
Are you alive because abortion was illegal?
»
Stand Up and Walk links with:
A Great Story on Life
»
King of Fools links with:
Hear Ye! Hear Ye!
Roe v. Wade Not Gone Unnoticed
The anniversary of Roe v. Wade hasn't slipped by me without notice. I have been thinking and stewing and writing something that will be ready to share soon.
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Fox visite a few days a go said a lot :)
by
chrys on January 24, 2005 07:07 PM
Hit "cancel" for previous comment - must be too slow. Fox visit was good - with her change in attitude - actually putting her "hat in" to have this all withdrawn! - await your "thinking and stewing" results :) - working on another topic in the same "thinking and stewing" realm ;-)
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chrys on January 24, 2005 07:10 PM
Well, that's one of those subjects people have very set ideas on, like religion, so I just steer clear of it. Has anyone ever been convinced by an argument? When it comes down to it, parents have to raise their kids as best they can so that their daughters don't grow up to consider it, & their sons are respectful of life & conception. There just seems a lot of public debate about something that's ultimately very private.
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jeff on January 26, 2005 08:57 PM
It is ultimately prviate, Jeff. I agree with that, but whether private or public, those of us who are faces with the decision have to live the rest of our lives with what we choose, and hopefully allow the child to live the rest of their's, too.
I do like how you stated that each gender be ultimately responsible. And by that I mean to choose life for one who has no voice.
by
Rae on January 26, 2005 11:52 PM
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Spoken
The Council has spoken and this past week's winning post is here (mmmm, chocolate- I think?).
The non-council post winner here; community betterment :D
Keeping it honest are all the votes of all those nominated.
My humble entry.
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January 23, 2005
Bless This House
Susban Graham is one of my favorite opera singers. La Belle Epoque calms me like no other CD.
So, imagine my even greater delight that she was one of those who performed for the President's inauguration. Accompanied, of course, by The President's Own, she sang "Bless This House."
Lovely choice by a lovely woman.
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January 22, 2005
Read 'em and Weep
Deb, at Marine Corps Mom, has posted a very touching letter from another mother of a Marine. Read, think, and then thank someone who has lost something for your gain.
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Thanks - We need more posts like this - more reminders. :)
by
chrys on January 22, 2005 08:10 PM
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Not many will die for even a righteous man
When in high school I heard the Star Spangled Banner more times than I cared. I played it repeatedly in band, stood at attention for it as a cheerleader, and snapped my gum a few times while I stood on the sidelines. I considered myself a patriotic, young, Republican girl, but I just didn't find myself moved by the national anthem.
Enter R. He was the first man I had known who wasn't in the military simply because it was a way out of a small town or jail. When he told his parents he didn't want to attend college because he wasn't mature enough and that he was opting for the United States Marine Corps instead, they weren't exactly pleased. But, they trusted their son and his knowledge of himself. When his four years were up, he felt ready for the "rigors" of collegiate life. He knew he was ready to study but his love of the Corps and country kept him in the Reserves. After a year of community college, he headed to the University of Missouri. We had enrolled in the same afternoon Spanish class, and thus our introduction. There were weekends that he gave up with me for his committment to the Corps. He would always return with some good stories of training and a few anecdotes of brothers with strange names bestowed on them by their Corps family.
Read more Not many will die for even a righteous man »
August of 1990 R told me that he anticipated getting called up. They could feel that it was coming- the news, the build up, etc. Sure enough, the call came. We married early winter while he was preparing to ship out. We stayed in a summer resort hotel right on the beach. Being off season, it was practically deserted expect for our party. We slept in, ate out, walked the pier and a tiny strip of the beach, among other things. The Atlantic calmed by winter was breathtaking, beautiful and calming.
Monday morning we moved quietly around, neither of us saying much. The ride into Jacksonville was hushed. The town appeared to have been neatly tucked in, lulled into comfortable sleep by knowledge of faithful protectors nearby. A guard at the gate let us pass and we drove over to the barracks. R pulled into a parking spot and turned the key. We hugged for an eternity of minutes. After an exchange of love and encouragement for the coming separation, he got out and turned to smile for me as I drove off. Every breath I took while passing out of town seemed purposed and labored. I don't remember getting back to the hotel, but I do recall lying on the polyester paisley bedspread. I stared at the ceiling for a long time before falling alseep.
A few months later, R deep in the heart of Saudi Arabia, and E growing in the depths of my womb, some circumstance found me hearing the Star Spangled Banner again. For a few seconds, I stood there, fighting myself, resisting what I felt coming. I pressed my fingernails into the palms of my hands and took shallow breaths. I looked around me at the kids talking while waiting for the event to begin, wanting to slap them, to shake them. I saw disinterested teachers mouthing the words while casually leaning against a doorjamb. I wanted to thump their heads and tell them to stand up! Pay attention! Mostly, I saw the face of my beloved R, the words of his letters flashing like subtitles on the screen of my memory. Suddenly this song became more than a half-hearted attempt at patriotism. Words had meaning; words had faces; words had progeny living inside my very body. The disrespect and disinterest became personal and the sacrifice of everyday comforts, of a college education, of time spent with a wife, of hearing the uterine heartbeat of his firstborn, were thoughtlessly stepped on like trash under the feet of spectators. No longer wrestling, I gave in and sang louder, stood taller, tears rolling down my face and neck, finally dissipating when they reached my heart.
"The land of the free and the home of the brave." Anyone can dissent. Anyone can complain. Anyone can argue. Anyone can protest. Not everyone will sacrifice their very life for the freedom of even one person. I feel so fortunate to know him and to be associated with one who can truly be counted as not only "one of the few, the proud," but the increasingly smaller number of the brave. Thank you, R. I love you so very much.
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God bless R. God bless all our men and women, who put their lives on the line for our country, and to impart the freedoms we enjoy to the oppressed. And God bless the families, and you, who wait and pray for their loved ones to come home safe and sound. May all their prayers be answered yes and amen.
by
Heart on January 23, 2005 03:01 PM
Thank you, Heart. And I agree.
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Rae on January 24, 2005 05:37 PM
I had a similar experience with a song, only in my case it was "America The Beautiful." Before 9/11 I knew the words of this song, but the full impact of the line "Who more than self their country loved,/and mercy more than life" did not hit me until I thought of the firefighters who ran back into the second tower after the first had collapsed. That line continues to impact me as our troops (some of whom are my friends) go to Iraq to show that their love for not only our country, but theirs too, is worth more than their own lives.
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Wacky Hermit on January 25, 2005 05:00 AM
BEAUTIFUL RAE! That was just beautiful!
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SALLY on January 26, 2005 08:31 AM
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No Way....
So, last evening when the girls and I arrived home from visiting with a neighbor, R teasingly greeted us with, "I know something you don't; it's on the answering machine." E and I exchanged hopeful, knowing looks and raced downstairs.
I had resigned myself to not having received a part in Oliver! and had actually been relieved. It would take so much time out of my already tight schedule, learning lines, and the, ummm, dancing. I was positive my E would get something though, so this call wasn't surprising. When the voice on the line introduced herself as the stage manager of the production and started by congratulating both of us, I was surprised. She continued by telling me that I had been cast as part of an adult ensemble, and E was cast as Bet, " a 13 year-old lass in Fagin's establisment who idolizes Nancy."
I am so excited for E. She dreams of being an actress one day, and I do mean literally dreams of auditions and filming and performing. It seems there hasn't been a play she's auditioned for in which she hasn't landed the lead female role. In this case, it's the only role for which about 35 other young gals tried to get. I only did this because she asked me to, and I recall reading somewhere recently that when your adolescent child invites you into their world, you should accept and enter.
Now, about that ensemble. I do hope it is singing only. The 20 minute dance routine the other night knocked me out for two days. Of course, I can now do the number perfectly, but who cares? Let's just say that I now have a whole lot more respect for dancers.
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Who will buy my sweet red roses? Two blooms for a penny?
Congratulations!
In fifth grade I tried out to sing the above part for a little solo in chorus. I didn't get it. The girl who did, continued to get all the parts for the rest of our educational careers--she was really good, and I am mediocre. Anyway, I still sang with the chorus, I really like Oliver, it's a fun one.
Go break a leg.
Any milk today mistress...?
by
joyella on January 23, 2005 11:52 AM
Congratulations to you both! Wow, how exciting for you to be in this together....this is a memory you will cherish forever. Break a leg!
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texasbug on January 23, 2005 08:16 PM
I think it will be great fun to do this play specifically (and to watch it) and to do this with E.
Thanks, ladies :D
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Rae on January 24, 2005 05:09 PM
WOW RAE! I WISH I COULD BE THERE! YOU BOTH WILL BE GREAT. TELL "E" I SAID CONGRATS!
by
sally on January 26, 2005 08:25 AM
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January 20, 2005
ZZZZZ
I.....am......so......t...i...r
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Hi Rae...I'm tired, too. Your post made me laugh, like I laughed out loud - from the gut - all by myself. :-)
by
Nicole Prescott on January 20, 2005 09:12 PM
hey rae! do you have any advice on dreams? i have a lot of them and they're really wierd most of the time. i know they mostly come from anxieties that i have throughtout the day. do you know any remedies that can make me not dream so much?! i dont mind dreaming, its just that i think about the dreams i've had all day long.
anyways, tell the girls hi for me!
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Ann on January 21, 2005 09:59 AM
Excess alcohol causes a reduction in REM sleep, which would correlate to a reduction in dreaming. Of course, the headache the next morning is probably worse than the cure!
You might also want to read up on lucid dreaming. I've never tried to master it, but have had experiences where I realize I am dreaming and take control of it on some level.
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andy on January 21, 2005 11:16 AM
Nicole- good, I like to make people laugh :D
Ann- you know, I think it interesting that you call me Rae and by the-name-that-must-not-be-mentioned :D I think I rather like it :D Hmmmm, let me think on that. I have rather vivid dreams myself. Will e-mail you.
Andy- I have done some lucid dreaming, but not for very long. Soon after I realize it, and begin to navigate, I fall out of the dream.
by
Rae on January 22, 2005 12:09 AM
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History Lesson
Today, we will set aside our final study of the Fall of the Roman Empire, and watch history in the making in the inauguration of President George W. Bush.
Thanks to Pajama Hadin for the photo.
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Rae, I see you didn't waste any time visiting Pajama Hadin...isn't he awesome?
And, btw, LaShawn reads your blog and posts comments....you RULE! ;-)
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texasbug on January 20, 2005 07:12 PM
Great pic of the prez...I do love that man!
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Cindy Swanson on January 21, 2005 06:53 AM
I'm interested as to what your daughters think of the protestors.
Personally, I think it's rude. Especially those that say "He's not my president". What does that mean? That you live in France or Canada or someplace else!?
It's insulting to me. Majority rule, folks. I did not like Clinton. Didn't vote for him either time. But he was our CIC - that deserves some amount of courtesy and respect.
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GrumpyBunny on January 21, 2005 02:17 PM
Texasbug- I wasted no time. Also, I sent an e-mail to Ms. Barber letting her know that I referred to her in my blog. She is so busy now with the exponential growth of her blog that she doesn't get by here very often, but we used to trade comments quite frequently. She hasn't forgotten us little guys :D
Cindy- me, too :D
GB- it irritated them to no end. They thought it was rude and incredibly disrespectful. And ITA with you about Clinton. I heard on protestor say that she wasn't going to take four more years and I thought, "uuuuhhh, yes you are, 'cause he is the president for four more years."
by
Rae on January 22, 2005 12:16 AM
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January 19, 2005
I am currently reading:
The Content of Our Character by Shelby Steele.
Looking for God in Harry Potter by John Granger.
Both books are as diverse as could be in subject matter, but each author asks their reader to think for themselves with information from both sides and to come to the most logical conclusion, not one that we are expected to have by influence of either ethnicity or denominational culture.
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Looking for God in Harry Potter, looks like an interesting one. I love the Potter books and have been annoyed with the bad press they have gotten by certain fundamentalist Christians. It is nice to see a little more Christian backing there--I still haven't been able to convince my sister to let her boys read them(I know they would love them!) Maybe this book will push her into the Potter camp? One can only hope.
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Joyella on January 19, 2005 09:22 PM
A "spread" of thought you've pounced on. :)
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chrys on January 20, 2005 02:25 AM
Joyella- this book (Looking for God) is fabulous! I am so thankful that I found it. I actually read an article about it in Christianity Today at Kris' house, and sent myself an e-mail with the name and author. I love it because it encourages me to not just give a knee-jerk response, but to use my mind to think through things. I think we created human beings sometimes forget that God, the perfect artist, made us in His image and that we have an inate desire to be creative like He has been and is. Our expressions are as unique and vast (architecture, production, various mediums of art, teaching, writing, mathematics, sciences) as He has created us.
I believe that there are some areas that are obvious for the Christian to discern as evil and unacceptable (p0_n_gra_h_) and there are others that are more grey and require further examination and investigation. In this case, by me- the parent. I read them before I allowed my oldest daughter to and have set an age limit of 13 for all my other daughters. Not because I find them scary, but because I want them to be old enough to understand all the meanings behind and woven through the stories.
I also think that many "fundamentalist" Christians reject any educational training, except that of seminary/Bible college, as being completely secular. They wrongly accept only a literal interpretation of loving the Lord our God with all our heart, soul, strength, and mind.
While he cautions and supports parents concern about true evil, Granger does an excellent job of distinguishing between invocational magic (wrong and evil according to scripture) and incantational magic, the latter which mimics God (as we do in decorating, building, and designing, planning, implementing, etc).
I know exactly what you are talking about (your sister). The secretary at our former church is also one of the church librarians and has stocked the shelves with anti-Potter rhetoric. I think that is fine, however, in the name of allowing people to make their own truly "informed" decisions, this book, Looking for God, should be right there next to them.
It seems that anytime I meet someone who was adimently against HP before reading them, did a complete turn around after reading them. It seems that those who are opposed are judgmently of those who are not, and those who are supportive of the series, are truly sad for those who won't read, as they are missing out on a truly great and future classic piece of literary work.
I have several friends who are wanting to read this after me, but I would have no problem sending it to you when they are finished :D
Chrys-??
by
Rae on January 20, 2005 09:54 AM
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nemo me impune lacessit
Translation of Barbra Boxer's entire line of questioning of Dr. Condoleezza Rice yesterday:
"Who do you think you are? denying your racial heritage and being a conservative Republican and wanting to serve in a white man's White House?"
Uh, yeah, Barbra. It was that obvious. I have never understood why so many black Americans (and I once read of a prominent black actress going to Africa and when asked what her ethnicity was, she replied, "African-American." The African looked at her and said, "No, you are an American with black skin. I'm African." She rethought her word choice.) have imposed the expectation of all blacks having to be a Democrat? If a black American chooses to be conservative in their politics and even (gasp!) call themselves a Republican, they are treated as a traitor to the black community (and by the way, I personally believe in one race- the human race, with varying ethnicities) and have their integrity and intelligence insulted (as was done by Barbra Boxer to Dr. Rice).
La Shawn Barber is a perfect example from the blogosphere. She is intelligent, graceful, strong, well-written and well-read. She is a Christian who has allowed her belief in God to shape her worldview rather than her culture, her peers, or her detractors. I have been reading her since about March of 2004 and have seen her attacked repeatedly for not buying into the "expected politics" of her black peers. She isn't a parrot of a white party. She uses her own mind, logic and rhetoric, influenced only by her faith to express her opinions. She isn't the only one, either.
Juliette of Baldilocks is another example of a conservative black woman. She hasn't "sold out to the Man" and hasn't compromised her integrity. She has proudly served her country in the United States Army, not some conspiritorial institution created to keep black people down. Her experiences and the opportunities she sought while in the military have lent themselves as a seasoning to her profound faith and shaping of her character into outstanding integrity, and service to the people of this country.
So, talk on Barbra Boxer. There are plenty of conservative black people out there who will continue to speak out for their fellow American citizens, promoting and encouraging thoughtful and respectful dialogue that will bring about the excellence of all peoples only at the expense of their own sweat and self-denial for the betterment of themselves and their neighbor, not at the expense of their neighbor.
P.S. Good for you, Dr. Rice. I was so proud that you didn't allow the malicious intent of Senator Boxer's questioning to rattle you, but rather reminded her to keep the dialogue away from false accusations and personal agendas.
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Something I didn't add on my own disseration on this subject.
But lets compare these two women, Senator Boxer, and Dr. soon-to-be-Secretary Rice.
Boxer comes off as a overly dramatic, back-biting loon.
Rice comes off as professional, elloquent and, as you say above, graceful.
I hope the American people see this distinction as well.
by
Jeremy on January 19, 2005 11:29 AM
Well put Rae. Although very popular in her home base, and among her factions, Boxer is an embarrassment for this Kalifornian
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Greg on January 19, 2005 02:19 PM
Thanks for posting this! I absolutely love Dr. Rice and I thought she handled the pressure incredibly. Like you, I am just amazed that the most pressure comes from another black woman!
By the way, another incredible contribution to the blogosphere by a black conservative can be found at Pajama Hadin. He's very intelligent and just amazing to read.
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texasbug on January 19, 2005 04:54 PM
Thanks, Rae. No good deed goes unpunished, of course, and what I say is not popular with certain people. But I can take it. As long as I rely on my Lord and Savior and not my own efforts, I can't go wrong. :)
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LB on January 19, 2005 08:33 PM
I echo your comments about La Shawn Barber. She's awesome...one of my daily blog visits, (as are you!)
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Cindy Swanson on January 20, 2005 07:42 AM
Jeremy- yes, eloquent and articulate.
Greg- I have wondered at her popularity with her constituents.
Texasbug- thanks for the link :D
LB- Amen, sister. I agree completely. I also think that it takes the denial of self in order to be a vessel of goodness for God.
Cindy- me, too:D And thank you so much :D
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Rae on January 20, 2005 09:37 AM
I understand and somewhat agree with your post. The 'treason' Boxer was trying to point out is one, in many minds have passed. Black is more than race; it's a political party, mindset if you may.
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thedarkestnoir on January 21, 2005 02:22 PM
Barbra Boxer is one of the best senators that we have. She is not my senator but would love to have her as ours any day. I am very proud of Boxer, she rocks.
by
Pam on April 13, 2005 04:12 PM
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Priceless
Time is a big deal to me. Not arriving somewhere on time. No. Those that know me well, know that ummm, that isn't very important to me. I am talking about the spectrum of time. More and more I am aware of how little of it I have left with E. There are times that she infuriates me. She can be persistent and so particular, but the detail in her artwork and her literature is amazingly detailed. She can argue and disagree with 100% of what I say, but she will never and has never lied to me. She can procrastinate with the best, but she knows how to have a good time. She is messy and we all know not to send her to find anything for us, but her penmanship is beautifully neat and she knows exactly where all of her things are. She is very private, but the most loyal friend or relative anyone of us could dare hope for.
I love this messy, laid-back, honest, creative girl who knows how to have fun and how to love. While I can't wait for her to be the adult she so wants to be, I just want to somehow freeze the really good moments; the ones that feed us both for a few days, or even weeks. Then hormones fluctuate; I embarrass her; a friend lets her down; she disrespects me; I disrespect her and we start all over again.
So many people compare life to a roller coaster. I prefer the see-saw, or teeter-totter as some are more familiar. Remember how much fun you would have going up and down, tallking as you rose into the air and then sailed down? Sometimes the person who was landing would really push it into the ground and you would get this little lift at the top. Sometimes a real jerk would jump off and let you fall on your back, all the while thinking himself very funny. Or maybe you were wearing a sundress or shorts and got a splinter in the back of your leg or burned your hands on the handles and so let your fingers alight just enough to hold on. Many days we would load up each end with six kids and watch the bend and secretly hope it would crack. The soothing rythmn of your feet swinging and landing, and pushing off again somehow made going back into a classroom or home more bearable.
"Teach us to count the days.
Teach us to make the days count.
Lead us in better ways
Somehow our souls forgot
Life means so much
Life means so much
Life means so much."
(Chris Rice, Life Means So Much).
I pray that I am not penny-wise and pound foolish in these last years. She is a gift immeasurably valuable and too costly to afford to lose.
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Rae...I can so relate! My only daughter is a senior in high school now. She is also a complex bundle of so many things, but I adore her and the feeling is mutual. I too want to freeze those precious moments.
Also, I love that Chris Rice song. He's written some great ones!
by
Cindy Swanson on January 19, 2005 05:52 AM
Hey Rae! Just lettin you know that it is possible to have a wonderful mother and grown-up-daughter relationship! Me and my mom have gotten so much closer since I've left the house. And as close as you and E are, I predict a wonderful future!!
I'm glad that you are who you are, and that you will someday be my sister-in-law!! Love you!
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Ann on January 19, 2005 05:33 PM
When my kids were young, I never understood the phrase "they grow up before you know it." Now that my son just turned 15, I know exactly what they mean. So you are right Rae, we have to enjoy the ups and try to laugh at the downs, even if they hurt and leave splinters. I agree with Ann, too, because I have developed a wonderful relationship with my mom. But only I after I realized I wasn't the center of the universe and she wasn't an ignoramus. :D
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Mrs.E on January 20, 2005 08:25 AM
Cindy- I am hoping that that thing that happens to people as they get older- you know where they seem to only remember all the good times- happens to me :D
Ann- thank you. I think we will be, but sometimes I can get distracted by the "here and now." :D
Mrs. E- while my mom and I have had a lot of difficult issues to examine, wait- while I have examined them ;), we are far better now than we have been. I confess that while the list isn't long, there are some things that she advised me about that have been correct. :D
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Rae on January 20, 2005 09:59 AM
Rae, I'm new. Sorry to say something so relatively insensitive...
I guess I ought go back and read your archives!!
I have yet to meet a single person who didn't have issues - especially when it comes to family members. I've got a good share of that market with step-family issues. And I know how hard it can be to break the cycle of bad parenting because I had a pretty rough early childhood. Anyway, thanks for reminding me that I'm blessed because my mom isn't part of my problem.
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Mrs.E on January 20, 2005 03:37 PM
Mrs. E- no worries. I didn't think your comment insensitive at all :D
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Rae on January 20, 2005 04:19 PM
Thanks for understanding, Rae.
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Mrs.E on January 22, 2005 03:06 PM
Rae, as my older daughter and I approach our shared birthday next week, and I prepare to celebrate our eleventh year together, this post really strikes home. Well done. Well done. :::typed with a lump in my throat:::
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Cindy on January 22, 2005 09:00 PM
Ahhhh, Cindy...thanks :D
by
Rae on January 25, 2005 12:32 AM
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January 18, 2005
A Knight and His "Lady"
Confessions in his comments reveal that a certain Zombyboy has a bit of a crush on one Alyson Hannigan. I had absolutely no idea who she was, but after a google image search, found a very lovely photo of her:
I liked this one best for two reasons: 1)Immodesty is highly over-rated, and 2)I like the sweetness portrayed.
"Boy and Alyson sittin' in a tree...."
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She played Willow on the Buffy show! She's great :)
by
Patti on January 18, 2005 04:21 PM
You mean, she played Willow-the-le$-bee-un-witch on "Buffy". Not so modest and sweet on the show, who knows what she is really like though.
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Joyella on January 18, 2005 08:29 PM
She also played a girl who stuck a flute in her hoo-ha in "American Pie". I like her, too.
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dorkafork on January 18, 2005 09:05 PM
Well, I have never seen either of those shows, but I chose this picture because of all the ones that were pulled up through google images, this was the most modest and sweet one available.
Joyella- I edited your word so that weirdo search engine users wouldn't find my site.
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Rae on January 19, 2005 12:31 AM
Mmmm, le$-bee-un-witches with flutes in the hoo-ha.
Modest and sweet has its merits too, of course.
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andy on January 19, 2005 08:03 AM
O.K. That's enough....no more of the "L" and HH stuff. K? This is a family friendly site, ya'll.
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Rae on January 19, 2005 09:32 AM
She's married to Alexis Denisof (I'm sure I spelled that wrong), the actor that played Wesley on Buffy and then on Angel.
by
Ith on January 19, 2005 11:39 AM
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My Two Left Feet
Updated: Six blisters and one humbled woman later, we have returned. The director's enthusiam and watching all the college students made it so much so enjoyable, so no matter if the phone rings tomorrow or not, it was fun.
So, E and I got a callback for Oliver!. Tonight, we have to demonstrate that we can pick-up quickly on dance rountines, a "dance element" it is called. The word stressed here is quickly.
Ummmm, yeah. I am sure that watching me attempt to count, keep step, smile and look wonderful* all while singing will at least give them something to point to and say "Don't do that." I am positive, however, I will be watching my daughter on stage sometime in April.
Read more My Two Left Feet »
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I bet you did great! Miss you here in "Misery"
by
Sharon on January 18, 2005 08:20 PM
Hey you! I used my superpowers to figure out how you found me, O.K. well, actually I looked at your ISP and then double checked the number against my sitemeter and found that you yahoo searched me, right?
How are you? Gosh I miss your laugh and perspective on life.
Please read, but recall, though it is published on-line, it is a journal, so I ain't perfect, but I am living :D
Come often, Sharon :D I miss so much of you, too.
P.S. Use a fake address next time or the spambots will overwhelm your addy with spam.
by
Rae on January 19, 2005 12:06 AM
Six blisters Pa-ding.
by
R on January 20, 2005 07:16 PM
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January 16, 2005
How does Holland manage?
My nose has super powers. I can smell anything from any distance. The hormones of pregnancy and the rigors of motherhood have only strengthened it's prowess.
So, when I say something smells funny, my family typically takes note. Well, guess what? This time my nose detected that funky old basement smell- musty and slightly damp.
E noticed that one of the Columbia-click boards was higher than the other. R went over to investigate as foundational and large structure home maintenance are the duties he claims.
For some reason, I thought living in the desert would free us from the "water in the basement" concern. However, due to the most recent rainfall in our area, I guess not.
As R was walking upstairs he said quietly, well I thought I was going to sleep tonight.
If it isn't one thing it is another. This time, I choose to look at the fact that all of our children are sleeping quietly and in health in their own beds. I choose to recall that my tummy had a delicious meal this afternoon and will have three more tomorrow. That I can drive myself anywhere I wish, vote for whom I choose, wear what I desire, and support or disagree with whomever I want. So, a little water is getting in somewhere....we have one another, our consciences, and our liberty. And good home insurance, too.
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Wow! What a great post..And what a great "choice" you made. :)
This put a smile on my face and you know what? That says a lot. Thanks rae. :)
by
Sam on January 17, 2005 12:01 PM
Oh good for you Rae!! The Kellenbergers know all about basements, water and mold and I don't think I told you that our kitchen flooded. Yes, water ran all over my kitchen, went through the floor and "rained" all over our school room not long after you we here. The entire time my children were running around collecting water in buckets, I was praying that all of our precious books and curriculum were not getting ruined. Unbelievably, not 1 of our books got wet. But the BEST thing about it was that I got to see my husband act like a true leader. He could have cussed (noone would have blamed him.) He chose to thank God for everything we have and handle this problem like it was a test of character. He passed with flying colors and I love him even more than I did.Now when something goes wrong we look at eachother and ask, "are you going to curse God or praise Him?" What a great song that is, "Blessed be the name of the Lord." It talks about praising God in the good times and praising him "when the darkness falls around." I think God was preparing us for a "real crisis" when my 6 year old nephew was diagnosed with a brain stem tumor that cannot be removed. We can choose to hate God or praise Him for the situation and the lessons that will be learned. You have the right attitude. Water inthe basement is a big problem, and very annoying, but alot worse could happen! XOXO KKK
by
chocolate on January 17, 2005 01:10 PM
Sorry to hear about that sis. I have always loved your positive view on things. I try to do the same when my boys are fussy, my house is a mess (due in large part to the remodeling that is going on), and the new puppy just peed on my carpet and I just had to shove dinner down so that I could get to work on time. When these things happen I often find myself on my way to work talking to myself "Breathe Sally, just breathe."
All my love!
by
Sally on January 17, 2005 02:07 PM
Thank you for your encouragement, ladies.
The good news is that the damage is extremely minimal and has been caused by a pipe leaking (we think), and that is covered by our insurance. We do have a $1000 deductible and this will most likely not hit that, but it could be far worse.
"Chocolate"- when did that happen? In December? What a trial! You guys have had more water in that house....
Sally- are you still working? We got the picture of the boys- they are so cute :D
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Rae on January 17, 2005 07:06 PM
I have now just cut the wall all the way up to the cieling to find the drain pipe joint leaking nasty drain water from the kitcken sink and dishwasher. It reeks and is slimy. Looks like a bad glue job on the drain piple elbow. I am very thankful it is not the foundation. Looks like it will cost exactly $999.99 to fix.
by
R on January 18, 2005 08:19 PM
Rae fell free to edit. I am hooked on spel chek cuz I got prollems spellun.
by
R on January 18, 2005 08:20 PM
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January 14, 2005
A Little of This and a Bit of That
Create your own :D
For those who have small children, I don't know how you could've avoided reading The Very Hungry Catepillar. Guess what? Eric Carle and his wife founded a Museum of Picture Book Art in Amherst, MA (named after himself, of course).
Ooooh, I think I'm turning Japenese.
Purple is pretty (snaps to Special K).
So feminine and unique.
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I love Sundance furniture. Never will be able to afford it, but I love it.
by
Ith on January 16, 2005 01:53 PM
Oh, Ith, me, too.
I love almost everything in the Sundance catalog, but, while I find it out of my price range, it isn't out of reach from my imagination :D
by
Rae on January 17, 2005 10:54 AM
I love you, but those happen to be the ugliest shoes I have ever seen. Please tell me you did not buy them. I don't think we can be friends anymore if you own those shoes.
by
Special K on January 19, 2005 07:16 PM
Noooo, those are way cute. I love them :D And I can't believe that you would make a girl choose between her shoes and her friend.....
by
Rae on January 19, 2005 07:45 PM
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Cooperation Makes it Happen: The Iraqi Election
The upcoming Iraqi elections have been the talk of the 'sphere and of NPR, Fox, and every other news organization. I have been listening and thinking.
For a government to be democratic the people must be accurately represented. In the United States, we are represented by number, but I wonder if it would be in the best interest of the Iraqi people to be represented by region according to their branch of Islam. Neither side seems willing to listen or to consider the other as valid. Why not divide up the country, Shi'ites, Sunni's, and Kurds each having their own provinces and given the amount of land according to the number of their population. Then each province could hold a representative election and presidential election placing in office whom they respect, will listen to, and follow. I just have this feeling that the way it is set up now isn't truly representative and will be viewed as a puppet government and thus rendered ineffective and disrespected by the majority of the Iraqi people.
I will gladly welcome, read, and consider any comments on the topic, as well.
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Rae,I've been reading some of your blogs and have some questions. What exactly do you mean that you are not a fundamentalist, but a reformed Christian? What is your definition of a fundamentalist? I think there are several definitions. What book would you suggest that I read to my 5 year old that she and I both would enjoy? We started to read "The Wind in the Willows" and we both found it soooo boring! Why is that considered a classic? Do you believe we should have gone to Iraq and exactly why? Where else should we go? XO
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chocolate on January 14, 2005 09:13 PM
I've been saying for over a year that Iraq would fair much better as United States of Iraq - sharing the natural resources according to population in each of the three states. The population is pretty much divided naturally that way already - why not make it official. Follow the Kurd's religious beliefs in the Kurd state - the Sunni religious style in the Sunni state and of course Shi'ites worship the way they believe. It's really hard for our United States population to understand (the real reason for the second amendment) how other countries believe so strongly in the connection of government to their religion.
The very meaning of the second amendment that our country was trying to avoid and to allow all religions to exist within our Christian "based" nation. Not to cancel the Christianity in our country.
Each of the three states or provinces would choose a governor, state representatives - just for the state. Then choose the national government for their military, highways, "everyone stuff" and natural resources. Keeping their laws governing individuals within their state. With the understanding that you may relocate to any of the states and follow that states laws. If a state would start to loose population - they may change their laws to reflect the desires of their people.
by
chrys on January 14, 2005 11:00 PM
"Chocholate" (that's unique :D)-
1) A better way of saying this is that I believe that the grace of God overcomes any sin that I commit. That means that I reject the idea of losing my salvation. If grace isn't earned by good works, then it can't be lost due to "bad" works. I spent the better part of my Christian life afraid of God pulling a trump card on me. You know, I would have a "bad" thought and thought that if I didn't confess it, then I would lose my salvation. So I would immediately repent and think myself saved again. My salvation isn't dependent on my confession of sin, but the joy of my salvation is made better by confession. Also, if one can lose their salvation and baptisim saves (which I reject as well- it is following the example of Christ and is figurative of our death, burial and ressurection with Christ and is an outward example of the covenant the He makes with me), then why when someone "rededicates their life" aren't they rebaptized? So, while I do accept the "fundamentals" of the faith: the inerrancy of the word, the virgin birth and sinless life of Christ, his substitionary atonement, a literal six days of creation, etc. I believe that Lutherans, Presbyterians, Methodists, Baptists, etc. are also Christians.
2)My definition of a fundamentalist is someone who rejects that other denominations will be "saved" because they don't ascribe to their interpretation of the scripture (immersion, sprinkling, predestination, etc). Non-trinitarians don't apply here as I see the Trinity as completely scriptural and not created by creeds or man, thus eliminating any who deny the complete humanity and Deity of Christ. The thing is, most people think of fundamentalists as those Muslim extremists who have declared jihad on anyone of Western decent. Note the word- extremists. Most people who are fundamentlists aren't extremists. Many fundamentalists also reject fantasy literature or any literature without an obvious moral point. I think it is forgotten that God is the ultimate and perfect artist and doesn't and hasn't always expressed Himself in a didactic manner.
3)I would start with the original Pooh stories by A.A. Milne. Start with half a chapter. Perhaps A Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett. The Wind in the Willows does have some slow chapters and the beginning is definitely slow. Once I had read it to E, and was familiar with it, I just gave a brief explanation to the other girls and then forged on to chapter two. Sarah Plain and Tall is another good one. Just So Stories and Rikki Tikki Tavi by Rudyard Kipling are terrific, too.
4)Yes, I believe that the president holds preemptive authority, and those who subscribe to the "I Hate Bush" club easily forget that he isn't the only and won't be the last president to use preemptive force and based on the information he had at the time, he made the best choice. Do you think me liberal because I don't listen to conservative talk shows or have a differing view of how the elections should be handled? I prefer NPR because I feel that it sharpens me. I hear what is being said and have to examine why I disagree, not have someone tell me why I should be disagreeing. For me, my rhetoric and logic skills are enhanced. There is a lot more to NPR than overt liberal news reporting, and for those cultural and world reports, I listen, as well.
5)I do wonder if we are overcommitted in Iraq. I think that we should have done something in Rwanda during Clinton's presidency and I wonder to what extent we should be involved in Sudan.
And now, it is time for Saturday jobs and errands. Miss you, friend.
by
Rae on January 15, 2005 11:16 AM
Nice idea on Iraq. The problem may not be the majority of moderate Iraqis. The problem is the militants that are in every region. The nicest thing about terror for the terrorist is that it is easy, does not take smarts or discipline and is cheap. They are everywhere in each state. The killing will continue.
by
r on January 15, 2005 08:44 PM
Yes the killings unfortuately will continue so something constructive needs to be tried/started. The "little" "King on the Mountain" brigades will fade away as more and more of their "followers?" find satisfaction in their own province/state or country recognizing their needs - instead of the would be dictators who are selling vague programs for their futures.
by
chrys on January 16, 2005 12:00 AM
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January 13, 2005
Pass the Thermometer
Updated: After more rest, I think R and I figured out that it is due to something other than a virus. My neighbor and I haven't been walking or lifting the last eight weeks and just started again on Monday (indoor track at the college). To maintain, I simply kept my caloric intake low (about 1000 calories a day). Well, I forgot to increase that due to increased output. So, a few crunchy tacos and I was feeling better. I even went with E to her tryout and ventured into the closed auditions myself. I got the compliment of my life when E finished her audition and was told "You have a lot of your mother in you." :D So, am on the mend, it isn't a virus, and I plan on walking tomorrow and having an eggwhite omlet as well as other nutrionally healthy meals and snacks. Thanks for the good thoughts :).
At about 10 this morning, I felt like my ears were going to explode and my head was going to cave into itself.
Read more Pass the Thermometer »
Anticipating a virus that has been going around, I did a few quick errands, returned home, gave some instructions and feel asleep for a few hours. I awakened to check on the girls and as I walked back to my room, I felt myself begin to faint. It was such a bizarre experience. I was completely conscious of the fact that I was going to and once I hit my knees, I threw out my hands to break the fall. I landed in a weird female push-up mode. When my cheek touched the carpet, I couldn't support the weight of my body and so fell sideways. My back hit the door jam hard. I thought to myself, what was that?! It wasn't exactly a faint because I completely aware of what was happenin; I just couldn't seem to control what my body was doing. After I pulled myself up (using the same doorjam), I immediately went back to my comfortable bed. A few more hours of sleep and I came downstairs to see what I could handle. This is about it. I am heading back up momentarily, but I have missed my girls today and so think we will bring the little tv into my room and cuddle up and watch a Pride and Prejudice video or something soothing like that.
E has auditions for Oliver Twist tonight. I had vaguely thought about auditioning, too. Even going so far as to have 16 bars of a song prepared to perform. I think that is canned. At least we can still get her there. She will be singing the chorus of "Into the West" and has a 30 second monologue (complete with a Cockney accent) that she pulled from a few years ago when she was Emily Jane in The Ransom of Emily Jane (reworked version of The Ransom of Red Chief by O Henry).
R is adjusting his schedule to come home a little earlier and take the girls to swim team. I am so thankful for his partnership, and that my girls are smart kids- they completed much of their school work on their own today. I couldn't make it without them, or at least life wouldn't be nearly as pleasant.
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Yikes! Maybe the storms have been carrying the cooties across the West!
Feel better.
by
Patrick on January 13, 2005 06:37 PM
I will pray you get better quick. Be careful.
by
Randy on January 13, 2005 06:50 PM
I am glad you are better now.
by
R on January 13, 2005 07:38 PM
Yo Rae - E-Mail missing - "long sensless comment"
(drum roll) I've been running into your web log off and on for some time now. Once I complained that all the blogs in "typepad" seemed "left" and someone told me to check out MuNu where you've "built."
Most memorable "run into" was the connection from Dan at CC now with his "World View" (not sure where I am about the Reihl part?! ;-D)
when he posted about the troops during Fallujah and a link to you listed the article with the pictures on the bridge with our burnt
troops.
Then - back to Dan (great guy - takes the time to say hi) - there you were again. One "silly" statement - where am I on your "blog roll" -
- I sent Dan an "E" saying if Rae can't make your roll - I'll never get there! He was kind enough to take my "silly" seriously and kindly
write back! I wrote and told him it was "silly" and that I'm working on an actual "site" - I have 4,000 megs on lease and very little
skill. Each blogging area leaves something to be desired. I'm trying to learn CSS, RSS/Atom to have exactly the "place" I want to have with
albums, catagories, permalink options and feed - enough space to maintain it. The last area had a good offering but 10megs will be used up quickly - it was looking pretty good - much more complete than the current offering.
SO - Each time I build - I end up tearing it down. The one before the current mess was actually going to $7,033.08 on Blogshares (whatever that means?!?!) - should have kept it - but a deer hit our car and everything crashed! :)
So - you're just a special "link" that I didn't want to loose again
and a "blog" I admire.
I'm just an "older than dirt" female Army veteran - married 30 years with a 27 year old son Donovan in Los Angeles married to brand new
citizen Jean - after working 33 years I have a lot of things to talk about but haven't "lined up my ducks" yet.
I'm honored that you've taken the time to ask.
Take Care - Be Happy - just - chrys
by
chrys on January 13, 2005 10:12 PM
Rae, I'm glad it was just an "energy problem". Now, while you're at it, I would also suggest having your ears checked by an ear specialist... and perhaps a chiropractor, too. The "fainting" you describe looks too much like a problem of the inner ear (the cochlea and the semicircular channels).
My wife was experiencing some dizziness that was very disturbing for her. When an ear specialist checked her, he adjusted some of the muscles in the neck region. These were so twisted and contracted that they hampered the blood flow to the inner ear, thus the dizziness. He counseled her to go to a chiropractor for physiotherapy if the symptoms persisted, which thankfully did not happen.
by
Eduardo on January 14, 2005 04:03 AM
There is nothing like good family, but please take care of yourself.
by
Greg on January 14, 2005 06:54 AM
I hope you started feeling better already. It's not fun to feel that way, call me if you need anything...should I give you my cell # again??? lol, just kidding.... not really! Well, anyway, you are again in my blogroll, I finally updated it last night.
Take care!
by
virginia on January 14, 2005 01:20 PM
Hope the omlet repaired the negative "float" that seemed like more of a virus. ;-) "Like Mom" - hmmm. Could be the very best of comments or the very worst. How did the auditions come out for E?
by
chrys on January 14, 2005 10:44 PM
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Light the Fire
My preference for indie and foreign films has been made quite obvious, so, no need to go into all that. My newest recommendation: Smoke Signals.
Victor learns to reach through his indurate heart and internalize how much his father loved his son despite his personal demons and failings as a parent. The journey is poignantly told through the Native American oral tradition of story-telling and with such subtle comicality that the viewer finds reconciliation as the only answer for Victor, and maybe for the viewer, as well.
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Indie movies: check out Goodbye Lenin, funny & elegiac German movie about the fall of the Berlin Wall.
by
jeff on January 13, 2005 01:30 PM
That is one of my all-time favorites. A Christian needs a thick skin to watch it but most of the complaints are true. The drinking hit home to my growing up. It stirred up a lot about relationship with my own dad too.
Ann and I showed a clip from it when we preached on David and Bathsheba. We showed the 'What's the worst thing you ever done?' clip and then had a time of confession at the alter. It was powerful.
I've also shown when Thomas confronts Victor as representing the faithful wounds of a friend. It is my favorite kind of movie, deep and funny.
Hey, Victorrrrrrrr.
Thomas, you're so full of shit.
It's more like Tonto and Tonto. :)
Lester FallsApart doing the weather and traffic.
I saw Sherman Alexie at a book signing. He was hilarious. He said he grew up Indian and Catholic...guilt squared. :)
He was a pretty liberal guy and took his shots at Bush, but he took shots at all his cohorts too. Bascically, he just messed with everybody.
He told a funny and touching story about being a pacifist yet receiving his deceased father's medals from the US Army on Oprah. True story.
Babbling on. The Army recruiter was at my house tonight. Junior is going to join the reserves after he graduates in May. He's going to basic and ait in a row instead of split option. He can start college in January and be fine. Thanks to you and yours for serving.
by
Ben on January 13, 2005 09:29 PM
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January 12, 2005
Unfettered
Jo and her husband had a healthy baby yesterday. Congratulations. We love you guys.
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That was slightly panic inducing, since I didn't *think* I had a husband or a baby. ;)
by
Jo on January 13, 2005 02:45 PM
Sorry, "That Jo." :D But, I would be happy for you if you were happy and had just delivered a baby and were married.... :D
by
Rae on January 13, 2005 04:05 PM
And a healthy strapping Man-Child! Congratulations. I can hear the buttons popping Dad.
by
R on January 13, 2005 07:36 PM
Well, check Nathan's blog, when and if it happens he'll probably be the first to know. ;)
by
Jo on January 14, 2005 09:14 AM
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Gracias
Wow! 697 Comments. Thanks to everyone who took a minute to comment and a double thanks to those who also posted a link.
Greg thanks you, and so do all the low-income women who will now be able to get a mamogram.
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Rae: Thanks much for posting this. We ended up with over 700 comments [a few folks posted under the previous day's announcement, which I had forgotten to close to commenting], and we raised $2,846, all but $500 of which [a corporate match] has already been received by the National Breast Cancer Foundation. Thanks for helping us out!
by
Greg on January 13, 2005 07:32 AM
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January 11, 2005
Comment Fun(draising)
Greg of California Hammonds is sponsoring a comment fundraiser TODAY with funds raised going toward the National Breast Cancer Foundation’s programs for education and low-cost or free mammograms for low-income women.
Please remember to stop by and with a comment or two or three or four or one hundred- what an easy way to support such a worthy cause.
Rae at
11:58 AM
|
A Fine Memory
»
The Grey Shadow links with:
Comment fundraiser
»
Six Meat Buffet links with:
Help out a good cause
»
Argghhh! The Home Of Two Of Jonah's Military Guys.. links with:
Don't hang up - hear me out!
»
She Who Will Be Obeyed! links with:
Busy, busy, busy
»
The LLama Butchers links with:
Llama Public Service Announcement
Of manners and such
K, after a particularly loud (and unacceptable) belch at the table:
"Mom, sometimes people do things but then afterwards they say what they need to, O.K.?"
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At our house, I've taught the kids to rate the quality of their belches, based on range, loudness and smell. Making it fun, they have no problem saying 'excuse me' before handing out a rating. I still win every time.
Urp.
Hector.
by
Hector Vex on January 11, 2005 10:43 AM
Oh....my....
Well, we do have females in this house and occuring in the van while driving, or while outside, let the games begin, but at my table- completely unacceptable. Now, teaching belching games to other people's children is fun (KD, what say ye?)
by
Rae on January 11, 2005 10:48 AM
I say pay backs are hell. You just wait, I am buying a plane ticket right now.
Let the record show..."I do not think bodily noises should be encouraged!"
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Special K on January 11, 2005 03:53 PM
That is hilarious ::: laughing ::: not belching... yet ::: just laughing :::
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Randy on January 11, 2005 07:18 PM
I may be the only one who still remembers the episode of "The Simpsons" where Jay Sherman of "The Critic" was a guest character.
Off-camera in multiple scenes were loud, earth-rending belches credited to Eudora Welty.
Ever since then, she has been my hero.
by
McGehee on January 12, 2005 12:26 PM
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January 09, 2005
Carbohydrates are my friend
Mmmmmm, loaded potatoes. Now, I love rib-eye or prime rib as much as the next person, but you just can't beat a gigantic Idaho twice-baked or skinned potato.
Dinner was delicious. Thank you, R.
Display Comments »
Loaded Potatoes rock! Especially when the outside is real crispy so it tastes like you're eating a fried rabbit or something...
Anyways, I've (or I'm about to as soon as I log in) linked you back.
So uh, la de da.
Hector.
by
Hector Vex on January 10, 2005 05:44 AM
Thanks for the reciprocal link, Mr. Vex.
Yes, la tee dah.
by
Rae on January 10, 2005 09:50 AM
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Attention
Jennifer says this is the year. Get cleaned-up, guys!
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This is the year for what? Clean shaven mugs?
And just when I thought my mullet was going to be all the rage!
by
Jeremy on January 10, 2005 07:02 AM
OK...I will go back to preppy if women will stop wearing those mid driff bearing low riding jeans.
by
Randy on January 10, 2005 07:34 AM
Well, fellas, did you follow the link? She's declared this to be the years she gets married (ala Charlotte on a certain series). So, I was lending a hand and getting the word out.
Jeremy- mullet! Gosh that made me laugh. Vivid imagination, you know.
Randy- I know. I dislike those myself. Well, I should qualify that with "I dislike the extreme versions." I do wear low-riders, but I don't have to visit salon in order to do so, and my tummy is never bared. Besides, looks like the '80's really are coming back- higher-waist pants and straight legs :D Saw them all over the mags.
by
Rae on January 10, 2005 09:55 AM
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January 08, 2005
Back in Town
Alisha is back. :D
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Never Again
Updated: Texasbug and I are on the same page (literally).
In 2001, we had just moved into one our most favorite homes. One of my friends had offered to come by with a house-warming present of Coconut Cream Pie. I obliged her. We feed the children "fun foods" and afterward, while they played dress-up, we enjoyed our own lunch of loaded baked potatoes. Between bites of potato swimming in butter and bejeweled with chives and bacon bits and sips of sweet iced-tea, we caught up. After the local news, she mentioned how she hadn't been able to sleep since hearing of that woman in Texas who drowned all of her children. My eyes widened. Believe it or not, we don't pay for television and rarely watch it. The USA Today hadn't been delivered and the NPR station I listened to broadcast ATC earlier in the morning than I rose. I was in the dark. As she filled me in on the details, I became physically sick. I excused myself and went into the bathroom and alternately wept and wretched. After about fifteen minutes, I returned to the table. The conversation never did return to pleasantries, though it wasn't from lack of trying.
Read more Never Again »
When she left, I immediately googled the information. What I read made me heart twist and my stomach once again lurch. In the coming weeks I was disgusted with the attempts of NOW to excuse her actions as due to the difficulties of parenting. There had been plenty of times in my mothering career that I was exhausted, overwhelmed, and frustrated. I didn't methodically drown and lay my children out, and calmly call the police and then my husband. I put the children down for a nap; I put them in the car and went for a drive; I ate cake; I took a nap; I read a book; I surfed the internet. I left them with my husband while I escaped to a movie, wandered Wal-Mart alone, or had coffee with a friend. I talked to him, cried to him, saught solace and commiseration with him and my women friends. This was the act of a very sick woman. After reading more, I knew what this was about.
There is a portion of the Christian culture that believes, wrongly believes, that a woman is to submit to her husband without question, without discussion. When I read that Rusty Yates induced his family to living in a broken down bus; and knowing his wife's battle with post-partum depression, encouraged her to go off of her meds and to have more children and in doing so recklessly ignored the advice of a professional psychiatrist, I made my judgment right then. A man who truly loves his wife ("as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her") would not ask his wife to sacrifice her health or the well-being of their children. Convenient for him to supply a 350 foot renovated bus for her to be home alone all day with four children while he went off to an office everyday and interacted with adults. Not only did he subject her to such wretched living conditions, he further isolated her in declaring homeschooling as the only God-approved method for educating their children. The physical solitude to which he now confined her undid the last shred of sanity she possessed. He continually ignored the advice of medical professionals (as fundamentalist extremists often do, as the culture encourages distrust of government and those of higher education and subscribes to conspiracy theories) and concerns of her family.
I decided who the true culprit was. I couldn't believe that he could not see his own heavy-handed contributions to her eventual mental decline and psychosis. When R and I considered home educating, my ability to cope was the biggest concern. R wanted a sane mother and emotionally healthy children above anything else. When I told him that I couldn't have anymore children without losing my mind, he agreed and dutifully called the urologist. Anytime someone declares God has revealed to them the only way in which to rear children, or conduct your marriage, or manage the minute details of your daily living, I am suspicious.
All that said, I agree with Jeff's analysis. Andrea Yates was not in her right mind. The reports of her response to her actions when she has been consistently treated while imprisoned proves that to me. She is astonished, astounded, ashamed, and disgusted with herself. She is remorseful. I think Andrea should have been placed in a mental facility and treated by a psychiatrist and with medications. To Jeff's thoughts, I add one more thing: it is Rusty Yates that I think should have been imprisoned. My belief system induces me to believe that both will somehow be held accountable in some measure and to some degree, but I can't help but think that Mr. Yates, as one in a position of leadership and influence, will recieve a heavier sentence. At least the thought comforts my soul. And that's my final answer.
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Wow.
I live in Texas, and I keep wondering why these women (there are more cases like this...) keep losing it in the Lone Star State. You have made some very valid, intelligent points here. Thank you, Rae, for your insight. I needed that.
by
Mrs.E on January 8, 2005 06:01 PM
The things that we do to others and to ourselves, and the things we allow others to do to us in the "name" of Christ are often horrific. Moreso, to me, because they are so often done with the very best of intentions, for the perceived good. That's what makes me shudder. That and the fact that there isn't one of us who isn't susceptible to ruining lives "for Jesus," including our own.
Sometimes I think stark hedonism would be preferable to Christianity. At least then motivations would be less susceptible to twisting self-deception, which is what I perceive as going on behind the Christianity that becomes rule-oriented.
by
Cindy on January 10, 2005 09:27 AM
I think there are times when we are all tempted to "Go Back to Egypt" (aka let someone else rule over us and does all the thinking) but Cindy, I think this is an extreme case. Extreme.
by
Rae on January 10, 2005 09:58 AM
Rae,
being from Texas...and just a few miles from the Yates' home....my feelings mirror yours. My friends and I talk about how it makes our stomachs lurch when we see Mr. Yates at the gym or at Target, living a regular old life. He is despicable!
For your readers who are not Christians...please don't blame Christianity. Blame those who would twist Christianity to suit their own need for control. Jesus Christ would NEVER condone the way Mr. Yates treated his wife. Christianity is not supposed to be a "religion of rules" but exactly the opposite. Freedom from all that.
My heart breaks for Andrea, because even though her acts were horrific, she is obviously sick. If she's ever treated properly for her illness, which your post alludes she has been, what kind of a life would she have with the coherent knowledge of what she's done? To treat or to punish...it is a lose, lose no matter what.
A true tragedy in every sense of the word, and so close to home for me. It's all anyone can talk about once again.
by
texasbug on January 11, 2005 10:12 PM
Thank you so much for visiting my blog and posting your awesome comments. I believe I stumbled on your blog from your link to the California Hammonds story, and I'm so glad I did!
I've added you to my blogroll and I hope a lot of my friends will drop by and visit. Thanks again!
by
texasbug on January 12, 2005 04:42 PM
Rae,
I have made a post on Texasbugs site for you. I would like apologize for my comments about Andrea Yates on your Blog Texasbug. I have to admit they where not the comments of a Christian at all. I hope you will accept these apologies.
Sicerely,
Pastor Rick
by
Pastor Rick Hill Jr on January 12, 2005 08:37 PM
Oh please. stop blaming the husband for the wicked wife's crime. She did it. Period. She's a freak who will burn in hell one day. I wish Rusty all the best and hope he finds a good woman someday and remains happy. As for Andrea...burn in hell psychotic freak!!!
by
Melanie on July 1, 2005 06:52 PM
May God be as mericful to you as you are to your fellow man, You aren't welcome to come back.
by
Rae on July 1, 2005 08:23 PM
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Lone Ranger and Tonto
"Kelli with an I" celebrated a birthday this week. I want to share a song with you, my friend:
I've been picked up when I was low
And I never have been left alone
I know it's true
Thanks to you
I have had my burdens shared
There've been valleys
That I have been carried through
Thanks to you
So I won't let another moment slip away
Right here, right now
I've got to stop and say
Thanks to you
I've learned to laugh a little bit harder
Thanks to you
I never cry alone
Thanks to you
I know what it means to have a friend that's true
Thanks to you
I remember all the walks
And all the crazy things that I got talked into
Thanks to you
And even now I am amzed
When I think of all the ways God's voice came through
Thanks to you
Through all the thick and thin
And places in between
We have been side by side
And that is why you hear me singing
Thanks to you
I've learned to laugh a little bit harder
Thanks to you
I never cry alone
Thanks to you
I know what it means to have a friend that's true
Thanks to you
For never giving up
Thanks to you
For sometimes giving in
Thank you for always listening
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AAWW! (sniff) Thank you! (sniff) This is one of those rare moments when I might let you hug me. Love ya, Kel
by
Kelli with an i on January 9, 2005 06:23 AM
Welcome :D Virtual Hugs are done like this, {{Kelli)) or I like this one \o/ .
by
Rae on January 9, 2005 10:21 AM
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January 07, 2005
Jester of Flaxen
Eleven years ago yesterday, A was born. She was my second daughter and the first child I delievered by natural childbirth. No drugs; no nothin'. It was one of the most empowering experiences I have ever had. It wasn't easy. I recall riding down the elevator with two rent-a-cops. It was obvious I was in labor and their discomfort was unnerving me. When I walked out of the elevator I told myself that if I was a 2, I was getting an epidural. Immediately. After checking in with the nurses and one of them checking me (literally) and telling me that I was an 8, I was relieved and excited. Then transition began and the relief wouldn't come until I delievered that 8 pound 14 1/2 little girl sunny-side-up into the world at 7:29 a.m. R would kiss my temple, damp with the sweat of a woman's work and after cutting the cord of his progeny, place a kiss on her cheeks fat with the nourishment of the only perfect place her mother and father would ever be able to provide her.
Yesterday, at 7:28 in the morning, I crept across the hall to her room and crawled into bed with her. She welcomed me with a sleepy smile and scooted over. I whispered happy birthday through her blonde curly hair into her ear. Too fast, I thought to myself. Then we both fell back to sleep.
There have been many times that I wish I could just slip her into my pocket to keep her from the unkind words of a "friend" or free from the sting of a wasp. Anytime she cries, her forehead and cheeks blotch and the tears draw pink track lines down her heart-shaped face. I sweep her up in my embrace and hug her tight until she calms. But when she laughs, it is contagious and infects every cell of my body with a joy that finds no words to describe it.
She plans on being a vet, marrying a vet, having two children and ten dogs. She will be a stunningly beautiful woman, with a heart big enough to hold the world, brains enough to move it, and strength enough to carry it.
Her heart is so generous, and I am so blessed to have a place in it. I am proud to know her and to know that she is my girl. I love you, baby. Happy Birthday.
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Reading about the depth of love for your girls always brings tears to my eyes. It is so nice to read about how much you cherish them. It makes me anticipate the birth of Ella all the more. It reminds me to look upon my children and appreciate every detail, even the not so pleasant ones :)
by
Kadi on January 8, 2005 09:10 AM
Oh, Kadi. Thank you so very much. It is amazing the love that can be drawn from my sometimes stingy soul by these children. They spur me to greater heights and deeper things of God.
You, too, are a wonderful mother. I am so glad that Ella is on the way for you (and M, too). :D
by
Rae on January 8, 2005 11:56 AM
I hope "A" knows how very much I love her and hope that she lives out all of her dreams and wishes for herself. I can't believe it has been 11 years!!! The time..... How I miss all of you and wish i could be there for all of the family moments. Tell "A" that I will always remember her no matter how old she gets as "Abcadiffles" if that is how its spelled! All my love. HAppy late birthday "A" --Sally
by
Sally on January 9, 2005 02:04 PM
It is true. When A laughs we all do. She laughs with her whole being.
Sorry we didn't get the card sent. There wasn't a stamp in the house.
by
Amy Jo on January 10, 2005 07:13 AM
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Friday Evening Fun
From the Llamas, who swiped it from JenSpeaks(whom I find I simply must blogroll) and she borrowed it from Fire Ant Gazette: A book meme. Copy the list from the last person in the chain, delete the names of the authors you don't have on your home library shelves and replace them with names of authors you do have. Bold the replacements.
From my shelves:
1. J.K. Rowling
2. Anne Lamott (let this not be an endorsement of her politics).
3. George MacDonald
4. Jane Austen
5. CS Lewis
6. JRR Tolkien
7. Emily Brontë
8. Isak Dinesen
9. Sophie Kinsella
10. William Shakespeare
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(let this not be an endorsement of her politics)
But don't you love the way she writes about her faith? (Well, that's assuming that the book you've got is "Traveling Mercies" and not "Bird By Bird"...which is excellent in its own right, but for much different reasons.)
by
Eric S on January 7, 2005 10:18 PM
Eric- hi. Thanks for coming by :) and thanks for commenting, too :D
Yes, I do enjoy most of her books and particularly the way in which she writes about faith and her road to it and in it and on it. I do have Traveling Mercies and Operating Instructions and several others waiting for me to read. I finished one (I can't recall the name but the protagnonist female was semi-autobiographical of Anne)recently that was too descriptive for me (think Herman Melville) and so I found myself skipping whole paragraphs.
by
Rae on January 7, 2005 10:29 PM
Rae, I can't place the last book you describe, so I guess I haven't read it. She can get, um, "descriptive" at times. ;-)
I highly recommend "Bird by Bird" as a wonderfully encouraging and instructive "how to" book for aspiring writers.
by
Eric S on January 7, 2005 10:34 PM
Thanks for the recommend, Eric. I will have to look for it first in my beloved used books nook.
by
Rae on January 7, 2005 10:51 PM
What a great site! I love the layout and did you have to be pretty? I mean, honestly !! I've had it with beautiful internet women! ;)
Thanks for stopping by my site. I'll be by yours too! :)
by
Sam on January 8, 2005 08:53 AM
I don't like Lamott's fiction at all, but her nonfiction is great. Operating Instructions is hilarious diary of having her first kid, & Bird by Bird is great writing advice.
Sam, please don't encourage the pink on gray, we're working on that ;p
by
jeff on January 8, 2005 01:35 PM
Don't read Blue Shoe by Lamott. I loved Operating Instructions, but Blue Shoe was very disappointing and bizzare (which I usually kind of like). I finished the book wanting my money back. There just wasn't anything to it.
I have to agree with Jeff on the Pink thing. I am thinking purple! Purple on grey, or purple on white, or purple...
by
Kelli with an I on January 9, 2005 06:30 AM
Purple anything would make you happy, K.
Hmmm, speaking of purple, get your bd present yet?:D
by
Rae on January 9, 2005 10:19 AM
i think Bronte would make a beautiful middle name(or first i geuss) for a daughter of mine.
hey sis, how are ya?
by
Nick on January 10, 2005 11:05 PM
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Rae at
10:05 PM
|
Comments (9)
»
the cheese stands alone links with:
Well, Read
»
annika's journal links with:
Bookshelf Meme
»
Travis' Column: Hot Off the Presses links with:
Bookshelf Meme
Stay-At-Home Mom (my foot)
"The ordinary arts we practice everyday at home are of more importance to the soul than their simplicity might suggest. " Thomas Moore
I quite like this quote.
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Every simple work and gesture we make coram Deo is of eternal, trascendental significance, because we are images of a holy, eternal and trascendent work.
St. Theresa of Avila used to say, "The LORD walks among the cooking pans of the mess hall", and indeed it does.
by
Eduardo on January 7, 2005 01:07 PM
Sorry for not explaining. Coram Deo = facing God or in the face of God.
by
Eduardo on January 7, 2005 01:14 PM
Rae--Thank you for this. It's what my heart/instinct/spirit tells me everyday and what I have to fight tooth and nail to believe enough to act on everyday.
by
Cindy on January 7, 2005 10:01 PM
Cindy, I realized that I somehow mixed up a few of the letters in your URL. The link in my blogroll is now fixed. :D
Cindy, teeth and nails are made sharper by tearing and filing. I am with you.
by
Rae on January 7, 2005 10:21 PM
Great quote!
He is Saint Thomas Moore, btw. A martyr to the whims of a king who would rather split the Church than be without his precious heir.
by
Patrick on January 10, 2005 10:55 AM
A saint really? I thought it was from the Irish writer Thomas Moore. Has be been made a saint? "Moore" information, please :D (Is the link I provided the wrong Mr. Moore?)
by
Rae on January 10, 2005 11:37 AM
Eduardo, I forgot to thank you for mentioning that quote from St. Theresa of Avila (Patrick first mentioned her here). I love anything that encourages giving faith hands and feet because sometimes the hands and feet of faith get tired and forget their purpose.
by
Rae on January 10, 2005 11:39 AM
You're right. I'm incorrect. I had no idea there was a another significant Thomas Moore. If they were modern day actors they wouldn't be able to have the same name. The new guy would have to modify or change his name acording to SAG rules, I believe.
Anyway, sorry for jumping the gun.
by
Patrick on January 10, 2005 01:17 PM
No worries, Patrick.
SAG Rules- now just how do you know about those?
by
Rae on January 11, 2005 08:14 AM
Rae, you're more than welcome. No problem!
Now, about the confusion between Thomas Moore and Sir (St.) Thomas More, I also got confused the first time I read something from Moore. I thought, "wow, I didn't know the old Chancellor had such literary talents". But then, the book (an anthology) was sensible enough to offer mini-biographies of every author in an appendix, and it was there that I learned that Moore and More were not the same person. Were it not for that mini-bio, I would fall for the same confusion than Patrick.
by
Eduardo on January 12, 2005 04:58 AM
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January 05, 2005
Pardon me...
while I stop and smell the roses.
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Rae, that scratch 'n sniff thing isn't working. ;)
by
Joe on January 5, 2005 02:45 PM
How hard did you scratch?
Good one, btw.
by
Rae on January 5, 2005 10:59 PM
A flower was offered to me,
Such a flower as May never bore;
But I said "I've a pretty rose tree,"
And I passed the sweet flower o'er.
Then I went to my pretty rose tree,
To tend her by day and by night;
But my rose turned away with jealousy,
And her thorns were my only delight.
(William Blake)
by
Eduardo on January 6, 2005 01:47 PM
Thanks for sharing those lovely words.
by
Rae on January 8, 2005 02:02 PM
I am wondering where Joe scratched! (hee hee)
by
Kelli with an I on January 9, 2005 06:32 AM
:::laughing::: Good one, K w/I.
Ummm, yeah, Joe, just what did you scratch?
by
Rae on January 9, 2005 10:17 AM
I scratched on the roses, like you're supposed to, silly. I already knew the other flower (on the masthead) thingy is broken. Sheesh, I'm not that dumb. :D
by
Joe on January 11, 2005 07:15 AM
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January 04, 2005
Dancing with the Sun
One of the things that I looked forward to in moving to UT was going to the Sundance Film Festival. So, tomorrow between the hours of 10 a.m. and 4 p.m. MST I am calling to get the info. The possibility of getting to attend this year is really exciting.
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That sounds really cool. REALLY cool.
by
Randy on January 4, 2005 07:01 PM
I know, doesn't it, Randy? I am sooooooo excited. Of course, I won't be buying the $2500 package, but I will be content with even one film review.
by
Rae on January 4, 2005 07:53 PM
Did u really move to Utah?
by
jeff on January 5, 2005 11:22 AM
Jeff- yes. This is the beginning of our third year here.
by
Rae on January 5, 2005 01:00 PM
oh rae, i am soooo jealous! it's one of my dreams to get to go to the festival! maybe me and nick can come out sometime.
by
Abb on January 6, 2005 12:04 PM
Don't be jealous yet, Abb. I would love for you and Nick and I to attend. That would be mucho fun!
In all the days work, I didn't call, but I will get it done tomorrow. Today was A's BD, and our mom didn't call. Imagine that. That's a blog for another time, though.
Miss you :)
by
Rae on January 6, 2005 10:19 PM
you two and your mother! yes that could be many other blog entries! sorry the B and the N are so close together! i was unfortunate to not have typing class in high school!
miss you too! i know that we will be seeing each other very soon!!
by
Ann on January 11, 2005 04:21 PM
Ann- at least you are coming into the family completely aware ;)
"very soon"- do you know something I don't?
by
Rae on January 11, 2005 04:29 PM
Our graduation is May 7th, that's all I meant! After that it could be returns "very soon" for the whole E famliy!!! =)
by
Ann on January 12, 2005 09:44 AM
Isnt the SUNDANCE FILM FESTVALE carried on by ROBERT REDFORD? frankly he is just another hollywood eletist who is acting like a idiot why dont he get a life and stop making such a fool of himself
by
mad heron on January 14, 2005 04:04 PM
Did you mean Festival? I haven't any idea how Robert Redford is acting. From a few things that I have read (a long time ago) he differs from myself on political matters, but he does sponsor the festival (and was the originator of it, I think, as well).
The Festival is a place for independent film makers to try to catch sponsors for their films. My preference is for indie films, so attending interests me. I could care less what his political leanings are.
by
Rae on January 14, 2005 07:00 PM
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Pattern Recognition
Two songs that I have really noticed the words to today:
Green Eyes (Coldplay)
Blue Eyes (Cary Brothers- his site offers a free song download of the week) .
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January 03, 2005
Me or Them?
Driving home from a bit of retail therapy for us girls, this song came on that I had heard a couple of weeks ago. The girls were quiet and contented, so I turned it up and sang along to the chorus. Previous confession of disinterest in pop music will show just how behind I may be, but I googled the lyrics tonight and found out it is "Daughters" by John Mayer.
My childhood prompted me to greater parenting than I received. The ironic thing is that my mother feels herself to have been a better mother than she had. Yesterday after a "discussion" with E, I realized that she knows no other mothering with which to compare mine. It is the nature of humanity to desire to improve upon what was given. At first I was offended at the thought of her possible desire to parent differently than I have her. I mean, I work hard at this mothering thing. It sometimes kicks my ass and it definitely wears me out, but I know they are getting it better than I had it. And, that is the standard, after all.
Isn't it?
Maybe the mother I chose to be is more a mother to me and what the little girl wanted rather than what my girls need. Am I striving to be the mother that E, A, C, and K need rather than the one I comfort myself with being? I think the real truth of my parenting will bleed through the heart of each girl in the mothering of her own children. Sometimes, I stop in the middle of something with them and think, In twenty years, when I am the grandmother, will I be pleased or pained when I witness my daughters responding like this to their children? And will I be big enough to let the successes be their own and claim their failures as an opportunity to say I am sorry for not modeling better parenting?
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I think most of us try and do the best we can with what we have. How are we really able to judge the job we are doing as we can never get into someone else's head? You probably are trying to be the bewst mother you can, using your past and what you needed but didn't get as a barometer, as well as trying to hear your children.
I do hope my children are better parents than I am, and that their children are better than they are; it isn't a matter of failure, it is a matter of proggression towards the best.
by
Rachel Ann on January 3, 2005 01:29 AM
Rae, Despite what you think of yourself, you are a wonderful mother and role model for all of your children. I have had the pleasure of wittnessing it first hand. You take great pride in watching them seceed in all they do. Where do you think they get some of that talent? From learning from their mom and dad who are wonderful Christian parents who care and love for their children in such a way that I could only hope to be half the mother that you are. I try and I hope that is enough. Being a mother is the most rewarding thing I have ever done in my entire life and hope that my children feel that I am doing a good job. xoxo
by
Sally on January 4, 2005 04:13 PM
They say that we suffer the first half of our lives for our parents and the second half for our children. The beauty is in knowing that it's a circle - and the prayer is in hoping that it go unbroken.
But, then, hell, what do I know? I just raise dogs.
by
Dan on January 4, 2005 05:43 PM
Yes, Rachel, I do hope my children are better than I am. I was confessing that I do hope I can accept that as good instead of insulting.
Sally, thank you :D
Dan, sometimes the circle needs to be broken, and hopefully, I ripped mine apart and started a whole new one ;) Hey, dogs need to be trained properly, too.
by
Rae on January 5, 2005 09:18 AM
I'd disagree, Rae, you can't break the "circle" as I mean it. If I read between the lines here, you broke a "pattern." That's usually a wonderful thing, not because it breaks the circle, but because it strengthens and improves it.
Likely you developed a consciousness about parenting that didn't exist in your family line. Some familes are still generations away, or maybe will never even realize that accomplishment. It's significant. You should be proud. And you can be proud while being angry, confused and or sad, so shush!
Now, me, I "broke" my circle because I didn't want it perpetuated and I'm cool with that. Be cool with your own bad self, girl! See ya around.
by
Dan on January 5, 2005 05:32 PM
I think I better understand your thought now, Dan. Thanks for the clarification.
by
Rae on January 5, 2005 09:38 PM
Rae, My therapist said that ALL parents screw up their kids but just to varying degrees. We can aim to screw our own kids up less than we ourselves were. hmmm, not such an encouraging thought. Well, I think I had a pretty good childhood, but there is still damage, perhaps that is why I made a bad choice in husband, or became so co-dependent of him. I am just saying we can only pray that God gives us the wisdom to do our best and the grace to be forgiven when we don't. (Parenting is THE hardest job ever, and that is why Oprah ISN'T EVERY woman.)
by
Joyella on January 6, 2005 08:27 AM
So here are some of the thoughts I had about the same song, "Daughters" : http://marriedwithoutahusband.blogspot.com/2004/12/fathers-be-good-to-your-daughters.html
by
joyella on January 6, 2005 08:35 AM
Joyella- I posted my thoughts on your thoughts over on your blog.
by
Rae on January 6, 2005 09:24 PM
I know it is late, but I had to comment on this one. Yes, I cry at everything lately (pregnancy does a number on the horomones), but this song makes me weep everytime I hear it. All we can do is give our children our love and guidance, and let God do the rest. As long as you do that, you will not regret your pareting choices. It is evident that you parent with an enormous amount of love. If they choose to parent differently, it just means that they are doing what they feel is best for their kids. Your grandchildren may be extremely different in nature than your kids. They may need a different kind of parenting. I know mine are very different from the child I was. But I still respect my mother's method of parenting, and love her for it.
by
Kadi on January 8, 2005 09:19 AM
I agree, Kadi. This whole parenting this is the most sanctifying thing I think that could ever be required of me.
And it is never too late for you to comment. I always welcome your thoughts :D
by
Rae on January 8, 2005 12:06 PM
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Lovely
One of my favorite love songs of all time:
Read more Lovely »
"Such Great Heights" by Iron Wine
I am thinking it's a sign
That the freckles in our eyes
Are mirror images and
When we kiss they're perfectly aligned
And I have to speculate
That God himself did make us into
Corresponding shapes like puzzles pieces
From the clay
True, it may seem like a stretch
But it's thoughts like this
That catch my troubled head
When you're away, when I am missing you to death
When you were out there on the road
For several weeks of shows
And when you scan the radio
I hope this song will guide you home
They will see us waving from such great heights
"Come down now," they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away
"Come down now," but we'll stay
I've tried my best to leave
This all on your machine
But the persistent beat
Sounded thin upon listening
That frankly will not fly
You will hear the shrillest highs
And lowest lows with the windows down
When this is guiding you home
They will see us waving from such great heights
"Come down now," they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away
"Come down now," but we'll stay...
« Hide the rest of Lovely
Display Comments »
Thanks for this Rae. I noticed this is on the Garden State soundtrack as well. I just picked it up from the iTunes Music Store.
by
Greg on January 3, 2005 08:13 AM
Love for another expressed in creative lyrics and with music that compliments is just such a feast for the heart.
by
Rae on January 3, 2005 11:56 AM
Yes, it is.
by
Greg on January 4, 2005 05:16 PM
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January 01, 2005
Only the Lonely
It is no coincidence that woman are typically more relational than men. In 9 out of 10 couples I know, the woman has more friends than her husband has, and she desires their company more frequently than a guy does that of his. (Wanna argue? Go back at look at the "t" word up there, otherwise, read on or head out).
So, while I have the perfect-for-me-man, intelligent-unperfect-but-maleable children, I really miss having a girlfriend right now. I miss having someone to go get a cup of coffee with at 9 p.m. I miss accessory shopping. I miss heading to the cinema and splitting the $10 Jumbo Popcorn/Soda/Candy special. I miss...I miss...I don't know; I just miss.
And for all you Pollyannas out there, 99% of the time, I appreciate the Glad Game, but this time, count me out.
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I think GQ had an article on men and friendships recently (was it GQ? I can't recall), exploring why men don't have many strong friendships later in life. Sadly, I don't remember what the reason was. :)
Thankfully, maybe I'm an exception to the rule in that I have formed some very strong friendships with men and women alike during my 20s and now into my early 30s. They may have waxed and waned through the years, but I'll take that over having never had them in my life.
by
andy on January 1, 2005 09:49 PM
Rae: I've seen similar research, and I think you are right. One of the things I talk at length about in my, um, manuscript, is the need for a husband (or partner) to foster and facilitate friendships between his wife and her friends. They are an essential component to female well-being. Probably are to men as well, as Andy implicitly suggests.
P.S. So glad you are still posting.
by
Greg on January 2, 2005 06:59 AM
Greg-My husband has always been very supportive of my friendships with my girlfriends. We are starting our third year here, and the cultural barrier has been very hard to break. Either people are LDS and so eager to prostelyze, or they aren't LDS but are so in love with the mountains they can't understand my, ummm, less enthusiastic view. It's not that I don't appreciate the unique beauty in this area, but I don't desire to spend all weekend long fighting the ice and snow to climb a big hill. Spring and summer, maybe. Risk life and limb? No. Also, I am regretting laughing over the Ag School majors having to take "Rural Sociology." It is a social science all it's own. I think women really desire these friendships, but have decided that most really suck (for lack of a better word) at forming them.
Andy- I think some men are very satisfied with their wife only. Remember, the word typically was used....;)
by
Rae on January 2, 2005 01:08 PM
"I think some men are very satisfied with their wife only."
Yeah, but then to whom do they talk when their wife is driving them batty? :)
by
andy on January 2, 2005 02:41 PM
Andy,
I thought that was why they invented blogs...?
by
Nathan on January 2, 2005 11:08 PM
Hooooonnnnnoooo, Nathan.
Blogs were invented so that females may store all the verbage that overwhelms their husbands.
Heh.
by
Rae on January 2, 2005 11:21 PM
I thought that was why they invented blogs...?
For most men-we just go back to work.
by
R on January 5, 2005 07:27 AM
Overtime is the bestfriend i never knew i had.
by
nick on January 6, 2005 01:42 PM
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Talk at the Barber Shop
La Shawn, one of my favorite Ladies of the 'Sphere, has a question for you.
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The blog event of 04 was shedding light on the Swift Vets in the Spring and Summer which forced the MSM and the DNC to panic and run the bogus smear "Favored Son" that culminated in Rathergat and cut the MSM/DNC campaign short by two months.
by
Rod Stanton on January 1, 2005 03:42 PM
I swear it's true.
by
Rod Stanton on January 1, 2005 03:44 PM
Thanks for the link, Rae. Many blessings to you and your family in the new year!
by
LB on January 1, 2005 08:21 PM
La Shawn- you are always welcome. Thanks for the well wishes, and to you, also.
by
Rae on January 1, 2005 09:45 PM
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Game Set Match
I feel like I have made every attempt to be faithful and supportive of you, my friend.* But I am finding it more and more difficult to do so. No more complaints that I don't make time for you, or call you frequently enough. I have proficiently slammed the ball over the net and into your court over and over and over. It's 40-Love. Either return volley or get out of the game.
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*this is no one with whom any of you are familiar (as in, no one reading this knows the person with whom I am exhausted), except R. Thank you, R, for being a good listener through all of this.
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Soup anyone?
Pam says really nice things. Thank you, Pam. :D :D
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No, I said LIKE the series... but better! ;)
by
pam on January 1, 2005 02:12 PM
Mmmm, better soup :D
by
Rae on January 1, 2005 02:55 PM
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It's Her Blogiversary
Happy Blogiversary to TulipGirl :)
And for being nominated for a BoB Award, too.
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Top Ten
List making is so limiting. I avoid it whenever possible. For some reason, I feel bound to the list and to deviate means a betrayal of some sort. However, due to Zboy's prompting, I will make a list of movies that I enjoyed this year.
1) Garden State. I have absolutely no idea why this film moves me so deeply, but it does. I have never heard a better matched soundtrack.
2)Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Eliminating the things that you think you can't live with ultimately takes away the person without whom you can't live.
3)Man on Fire. Denzel Washington and Dakota Fanning create such a connection on screen that makes this film compelling and completely believable. I wish I had had a Creasy when I was growing-up.
4)Maria Full of Grace. A wrenching and fascinating film.
5)Osama. I think every woman complaining that the United States is opressive be required to view this film. It made my heart hurt.
6)The Bourne Supremacy. The second of three, this film held my full attention the entire time. The further development of Jason's character stuck and didn't seem out of place. My favorite scene is when Bourne is fighting the operative in Germany in whose home he was waiting. The guy has zip ties on and it was such a tense and well-matched fight....I can't wait to see the third installment.
7)Napoleon Dynamite. Stupid films rarely appeal to me, but this one was silly and funny. And any girl would be impressed with a guy building her a cake.
8)Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.. When I read that a new director, the Columbus guy who did Y tu Mamá También was directing, I new that he would lend an artistic interpretation to the screenplay. I am typically a purist, but I really did enjoy the few liberties he took. It produced a more mature, creative film that even my purist offspring found acceptable.
9)Kill Bill, Vol.2 This the ultimate female revenge movie. Cathartic films are sometimes necessary to keep us from doing what shouldn't be done or what doing would undo us.
10)A Series of Unfortunate Events. A small piece in Newsweek last spring announced the film version of Lemony Snicket's smash hit books to the girls and me. We couldn't wait to see the movie and we weren't disappointed. It presented as completely fantastical reality, something all kids already enjoy, but in which more adults should indulge.
My hopes for a year in which you grow stronger, laugh harder, and look longer.
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Rae, I just watched "Osama" and I totally agree with you that every woman who thinks she is oppressed should watch it. Although I thought some of the editing was strange and the lines confusing, the story was heartwrenching. We are so lucky to be born in America. I disagree with you on "Kill Bill" but I think it is because I couldn't make it past the violence in the first 5 minutes. What is cathartic about blood and death? This is exactly why I did not want to see "The Passion." I think because I am a visual that those violent images stick with me and bother me. I still can visualize the scenes in "The Excorcist" when the listen girls head spins around and in "Nightmare" where the girl is being dragged nak3d across the ceiling while being stab_ed and the boyfriend is watching. Yuck!!! I love movies like "Bourne Supremecy." Chad and I always rent the action packed mysteries. I have stayed away from Harry Potter and Lemeny Snicket because I am not sure where I stand on whether it is harmful to children. I would also like time to preview them before my children see them and haven't had time yet. I will try to rent the others on your list.
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Kelly on January 1, 2005 04:42 PM
Kelly- re: Kill Bill. It wasn't the blood and violence that was cathartic. It was the idea of exacting revenge against those who have harmed you or someone you love. As a human, I occasionally wrestle with my desire for revenge.
The Series of Unfortunate Events isn't scary at all, just, well occasionally depressing. It stimulates less provocation for Christians than HP does. Last February, I decided to read the HP series myself and make own decision. It seemed communistic to let someone else tell me what my thoughts should be about something. I think we Christians can sometimes allow other people to think for us, to decide for us on some of the more grey areas of the liberties of Christ (please note that I am not talking obvious issues, like p@rn, etc.) So, I read them...all. I enjoyed them and found so many Christian themes in them. I called and asked B at the church office to ask if I could borrow the books that they have (and I think it should change that they only stock books that support their personal perspective against HP). I read them (the second time, the first being without having ever read HP) and found them grossly exaggerated and much taken out of context. I am waiting to receive the book Looking for God in Harry Potter written by a homeschooling Dad who began reading them much like myself, in search of an opinion formed by his own brain and by the guidance of the Holy Spirit. E and I honestly now feel sorry for the great literature that people are missing out on in this series. I would strongly recommend that a parent read it first so that they may 1)be prepared to discuss the book and it's ensuing themes, and 2)to enjoy a profound addition to the world of children's literature.
Let me know what you think of the other films :)
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Rae on January 1, 2005 05:33 PM
I can only comment on four of the above movies. I have only seen Man on Fire it was good but very gory. Osama, O.K. I can understand and appreciate but I don't have to like it. The Bourne Supremacy-best. Not nearly as gory as Man on Fire, it definitley drew me in. Napoleon Dynamite-very good. I think I saw the Kill Bill #1 and thought it to be mindless gratuitous violence, no class.
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R on January 1, 2005 06:34 PM
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HammerHead
